


Pauper Lions

by schreiberling_writing



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Coming Out, Coming of Age, Cuddling & Snuggling, Fights, Fluff and Angst, Fluffy Ending, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Kissing, Light Angst, M/M, Making Out, Protective Siblings, Secret Relationship, Siblings, Skateboarding, Sleepy Cuddles, Swearing, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-14
Updated: 2019-07-09
Packaged: 2019-10-10 08:14:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 32,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17422217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/schreiberling_writing/pseuds/schreiberling_writing
Summary: Rule #08 is that Johnny's little sister is off limits for all members of Pauper Lions. Which is easy for Lucas. He likes Johnny's brother better anyways.Or alternativelyLucas is not as straight as he initially figured but Johnny is protective.





	1. Just Smoke

**Author's Note:**

> Just to clarify the ages:
> 
> Johnny - 23  
> Jaehyun - 22  
> Mark - 21  
> Lucas - 21  
> Yeri"-19  
> Donghyuck -17

Johnny is known for being possessive. He always hogs his own drinks, never shares his food and doesn't lend his clothes to anyone. The thing he is most possessive and protective of however is his family- or rather his sister Yeri.

When they founded their band 'Pauper Lions' they put up rules. A simple set of 18 rules none of them shall ever break. After simple things like never be selfish and think only of your own success (rule #3) or never run out after petty fights (rule #5) Is one thing that Johnny insisted on.

Rule #8 is that Johnny's little sister is off limits for all of them and shall never be involved with any of the members. Sounds easy enough right? It kind of is. For Lucas at least. His interests lay... elsewhere.

You see- Lucas is straight. He likes girls with long hair and pink lips and boobs. At least he thought so for the longest time. That's was until Donghyuck happened. The simply most mesmerizing person in the world. Turns out he isn't as hetero as initially thought.

Because Hyuck is everything he wants and more. Million dollar smile, honey skin and a body to die for. Not with abs and ripped muscles but rather with soft curves and a tiny waist.

He fell for Seo Donghyuck last summer. The guys were hanging out at Johnny's place. It was too hot to actually practice for their band so they just opted for lounging in Johnny's room in front of a fan with cold beers. It was a normal day. Nothing special.That is until Johnny's brother bursted into the room.

You see, he knew Hyuck ever since the kid was 12 years old. But he didn't see Hyuck in over a year since the boy spent a year abroad in Canada. To say that he changed would be an understatement.

The baby fat had melted off his cheeks and his small, scrawny body became lithe and less awkward. He also ditched obnoxious graphic tee's and loose pants for fitted jeans hugging his hips and shimmery eyeshadow. Overall he went from cute kid to the beautiful and hot mess that captured Lucas' heart.

He doesn't really break any rules, right? Lucas would never ever lay a hand on Yeri. So he doesn't necessarily break rule #08. He likes Hyuck- not Yeri. But he's pretty sure that if he'd make any moves on Johnny's baby brother... let's just say he'd probably chop his dick off and feed it to the sharks. Soooo he keeps it to himself and never ever in a million years under any circumstance wants Johnny to find out whom he likes.

"Dude are you high?"  
Mark wrenches him from his thoughts. Lucas looks up from where he lounges on the old, brown leather sofa that rests in Johnny's garage. They turned it into their rehearsal room when the old Mr Kim threw them out of the place they rented because: 'You little rascals bring me nothing but trouble with that tasteless ruckus you cause!'

"What the fuck Mark?? It's literally 10 in the morning."  
Mark tilts his head sideways and frowns.  
"So you're not high?"  
Lucas sighs exasperated.  
"No Man! I'm just... a little caught up in my thoughts."

  
Mark's face softens and he falls onto the sofa next to Lucas.  
"Your dad's been drinking again? "  
With a small voice Mark asks. Lucas runs a hand across his face in hopes of getting rid of the tiredness. The mention of that asshole sours his mood even more. His dad is an alcoholic douchebag that manages to get to work enough to barely pay their rent.

  
"Has he ever really stopped?"  
Mark huffs out a humorless laugh.  
"I guess not. At least you still have a dad. My old man went to buy cigarettes when I was 8 and hasn't returned since."  
Mark states with a big hand gesture. They both have to laugh at that. It should be sad, really. But where they come from it's best to just laugh it off, straighten your shoulders and keep on going. They have no time for self pity.

Marks stands up and stretches a hand out to pull Lucas to stand.  
"C'mon Dude. We don't have a lot of time left to rehearse. Your shift starts at 1, right?"  
Lucas let's his head fall back and groans.  
"Fuck you're right it does..."  
Mark laughs and pats his back with a little too much force.  
"Let's get it!"

-

His shift couldn't be more boring. It's Thursday which means little to no customers and plenty of time to clean the cars and sort the documents. He finished fixing the last car with his boss, Taeyong, about 30 minutes ago. After that the man excused himself to get some food for the both of them and left Lucas alone in the garage. Which is why he's here now: alone, bored out of his mind and about to fall asleep.

He straightens his back and cringes at the cracks that erupt from his spine. He's really not used to being hunched over the desk to read documents for what feels like forever.

Lucas leans back and taps his fingers on the table. The pack of cigarettes resting on the windowsill looks very tempting. He begins to nervously tap his food and gnaw at his lip until he decides- fuck it!

He grabs the pack and scurries out the backdoor. Leaning against the old brickwall littered with graffitis he tries to fish out the lighter from his backpocket. He smiles triumphantly when he finds the stubborn little thing. It used to be white but now it has a more yellowish color. The lion that he scribbled on it with black sharpie is starting to fade as well.

He lights himself a cigarette and breathes in the smoke. It doesn't taste good or anything. More the opposite. It leaves a unique, disgusting stench in the back of his throat for the rest of the day. But he likes warm smoke filling his lungs. He craves the feeling of tired and relaxed muscles and a slightly fuzzy mind right after. Lazily he opens his eyes and watches the smoke climb up into the air.

He finished half the cigarette already when he heard a crash and cursing just around the corner. He really should mind his own business. It's almost like a rule in his neighborhood. Don't get involved.

And he tries hard to ignore everything that doesn't involve him. But the cursewords he can make out make his stomach churn and his fingertips antsy. He lets the cigarette fall to the floor and stomps on it with his foot. He is about to hurry inside and just forget all about it when he hears another crash and someone yelling something along the lines of 'fucking bitch!'

Lucas groans and lets his head fall back. He can't just leave now. What if someone gets killed in front of their shop. That'd be bad for the business, right? Satisfied enough with his excuse he turns and walks in direction of the noise.

That turns out to be one of his best decisions so far. Right as he rounds the corner he hears and sees Donghyuck struggling against the hold of two guys and a third one landing a punch straight across his face. The third guy already has a bloody nose so Donghyuck must've fought back.

Lucas whole body tenses and his stomach drops. He balls up his fists and grits his teeth striding over to the group. He probably never threw a punch so fast. The guy stumbes to the ground, groans and holds his cheek. He looks at Lucas with wide eyes that turn into a frown real fast. He doesn't like to fight but he's been through enough shit and there's no way he'd let anyone lay a hand on the boy of his dreams!

So he dives right after the guy and straddles him to throw even more punches to his pathetic face. He gets maybe two or three blows before he's yanked off by one of the other dudes. Two on one is really fucking unfair.

They land a few kicks and punches before Lucas can free himself to fight back properly. He doesn't really see nor care who and which part of them he punches. He doesn't even acknowledge the dull pain in his fist and the rest of his body. Lucas is blinded by rage and consumed with anger.

Right after he landed another hard punch to one guy's nose he hears someone yell and approach them quickly.  
"YA YOU BASTARDS! LEAVE 'EM ALONE!"  
Lucas turns and sees Taeyong approach

. His jaw is set tight and his eyebrows are knit together. What makes the assholes bolt however is the baseball bat Taeyong swings in his right hand. They look at each other with big eyes before peeling their friend off the turf and scurrying away.  
Taeyong yells after them:  
"YEAH AND DON'T YOU DARE COME BACK HERE YOU MOTHERFUCKERS!"

The only thing occupying Lucas mind however is Donghyuck and his wellbeing. He scrambles over to the boy who's holding his bleeding nose and helps him stand up. He cradles Donghyuck's face and pulls his hands away to get a look at his injury.  
" Oh my- fuck! Jesus Donghyuck are you okay? Does it hurt? Fucking hell-"

"Hey"  
Donghyuck interrupts him calmly.  
"I'm fine you should worry about yourself. You look like shit."  
Donghyuck said with a painful smile.

Lucas snaps his eyes away from Hyuck when Taeyong hurries over to them  
"Fucking hell are you guys okay?"  
Taeyong asks full on mom-mode. After being assured that no ambulance or hospital visit is needed he pulls them into the garage to fix them up.

-

Lucas hisses as Donghyuck dabs alcohol on the cut on his lips.  
"Sorry." the boy mumbles.  
"It's fine."  
Lucas heart is beating faster than Usain Bolt runs.

Hyuck is so close that he could probably count his lashes if he wanted to. Maybe he should? Is that stupid? His head feels kind of fuzzy. Maybe he has a concussion... Donghyuck swipes over his lips with a delicate touch and yep. Definently a concussion.

His hands are sweaty and he prays to God that Donghyuck doesn't notice as he grabs them to clean the cuts there too. His hands are red and bloody and some parts already start blooming in a deep shade of purple.

He'll have these bruises for a awhile... Other than his knuckles and lips he got a nasty black eye and a bunch of smaller bruises littered here and there. But Donghyuck got away with only a bleeding nose so it's definently worth it!

"You're an idiot you know."  
Donghyuck huffs and starts to repack the first aid kit Taeyong handed them.  
"You really shouldn't have gotten involved. Look at you!"

Lucas feels weird as Hyuck frowns in concern. It's so out of place, so unlike the bright, snarky Donghyuck he knows. It seems too fragile. So he reaches forward tentatively and smoothes out the frown between Hyuck's eyebrows.

"I'm fine Hyuck. I'm just glad nothing bad happened to you."  
Hyuck's eyes grow wide and his mouth falls open. He shakes his head a little as if he wants to get rid of the thought process inside and pouts. Actually full blown adorable pouting.

"Whatever you dumbass. Don't get yourself into trouble for someone else."  
He grabs the first aid kit and is about to walk away when Lucas grabs his wrist. He'll just blame everything he does and says now on a confused mind caused by a slight concussion. A brilliant plan.

"You know-"  
He says in a low voice. Donghyuck looks at him with slightly raised eyebrows, urging him to continue.  
"- if it was to keep you safe, I'd gladly take a million more beatings."  
A deep red colour makes its way onto Hyuck's cheeks and to his ears. He's blushing bright crimson.

"Don't say shit like that Wong or I'll bite your head of!"  
He wrenches his arm free and storms off.  
Jup. That's the Donghyuck he knows and likes.

And maybe he lays in bed at night. His body aching and a big smile on his face thinking about the delicate touch to his lips and the rosy blush coloring Donghyuck's cheeks.

-

Another thing Johnny is known for is throwing the most insane parties ever. One would expect that wouldn't work considering the Seo family lives in a small two story house but... Johnny always makes it work.

"Man Johnny pulled all registers for this one."  
Jaehyun mumbles from where he sits on the kitchen counter. Mark Jaehyun and Lucas decided to cram into the small kitchen, away from all the noise and grinding bodies in the living room.

Johnny got caught up somewhere on the way, flocked by girls who wanted to wish him a happy birthday. So they decided to just let him perish and get high in the kitchen.

"Jaehyun my Dude..."  
Mark speaks up. He is slumped over the counter from where he sits on the old high chair.  
"Are pets called pets because we pet them?"  
Jaehyun rolls his head in direction of Mark and squints.

"Bro you're stupid." he states as if it is a well known fact.  
"It's called petting because we do it to pets obviously."  
Lucas decides then and there that this group shares one braincell and he owns it.  
"Shit you guys are fucking stoned."

He chuckles. Mark usually doesn't smoke joints or anything for that matter. He only likes to get high when he's upset which means he probably fought with his mom. For Jaehyun it's rather common to be found with a joint at parties. He is just the worst pothead and uses every occasion he gets to get high.

"Imma go find Johnny. I don't think I can handle more stupidity...".  
Of course he makes sure they both drink some water before he leaves. They're his best friends after all.

Some basic SoundCloud rapper blasting in the living room makes the miserable image of young people trying to drink their problems away even worse.

After fighting his way through the crowds of sweaty bodies he decides that one more elbow rammed into his side just isn't worth it. He can't take any more neon lights and girls grinding on him. He needs some fresh air and maybe a cigarette.

He is right. Fresh air feels too good to be true. It's such a stark contrast to the thick stuffy air inside the house. He leans back against the cold wall and inhales smoke with a satisfied grin. His muscles start feeling even more relaxed and his mind is in a state of comfortable fuzziness.

He doesn't bat an eyelash when the backdoor slides open. He doesn't even open his eyes to look. He really couldn't care less about who-  
His eyes snap open when a hand grabs into the pocket of his jacket.

Donghyuck stands in front of him with a devilish smirk gracing his lips, holding Lucas's pack of cigarettes in his hands. He takes one out to press it between his shiny lips. Is he wearing lips gloss? His lips can't possibly be that sparkly by themselves... Or maybe they can. He is kind of an angel after all-

"You have a lighter too?"  
Donghyuck's muffled question snaps Lucas focus back to make eyecontact.  
"Uuhm..."  
He manages unintelligently. Donghyuck raises his eyebrows expectantly. He is really fucking pretty...

Lucas decides that today he will be confident. This fine day is chosen to apply his perfect flirt techniques to the boy of his dreams. Besides that he is relaxed enough after half a joint and a cigarette.

  
"Inhale."  
He whispers as he leans forward to allign his cigarette with the one between Hyuck's lips that is technically also his but let's face it. He'd give this boy the world. Lucas inhales as well and the stub between his lips glows bright orange. He smiles in victory when the other one is lit. And leans back again.

Donghyuck takes the cigarette between his fingers and inhales deeply. Someone smoking really shouldn't look that mesmerizing.  
"Your brother will kill me if he finds out I let you smoke."  
Donghyuck grins at him. His eyes crinkle in mischief.  
"What he doesn't know..."  
And Lucas huffs a laugh at that.

"How are your..."  
Hyuck inhales mid sentence and throws his head back to exhale.  
"... injuries?"

They haven't really seen each other since that incident a week ago. His black eye faded into a disgusting yellow- greenish color and the cut on his lips started healing properly. He cocks his head.  
"Fine I guess. They weren't that bad in the first place."

Donghyuck looks at the floor and nods. He is shifting his weight nervously in front of Lucas.  
"I just wanted to say-"  
He looks up at him with an expression so honest and open that Lucas almost choked on his salvia.  
"thank you I guess..."

A warm feeling bubbles up in his stomach and spreads to his fingertips. He can't avoid the bright smile making its way onto his face. And when he sees Hyuck smiling back just as bright he thinks he doesn't want to stop it anyways.

"It's no problem."  
He rubs the back of his neck.  
"I'm just glad I got to protect you."  
Hyuck huffs which is probably supposed to look annoyed but is just plain adorable.  
"I don't need to be protected."

  
He avoids Lucas gaze and turns his eyes away. He wants to see more of Donghyuck's adorably annoyed expression. So Lucas leans forward and to the side in an attempt to catch his gaze. And Hyuck only managed to ignore him for so long before he gave in and turned his head to glance at Lucas's bright smile.

And suddenly they are close. Lucas stops breathing properly and just stares at the ethereal being that is Seo Donghyuck. He can't stop his gaze from flickering to soft pink lips. Donghyuck's eyes drop to Lucas' lips and he swears he can feel his heart beating in his throat.

He's not completely sure who leans in first but suddenly they are kissing. Donghyuck's lips are soft and wet and slightly sticky. Definently lipgloss. Lucas puts his calloused hands on both sides of Donghyuck's face.

The distinct taste of smoke and cherry liquor invades his mouth. From this close Lucas can feel the sweet fresh scent that is so distinctly Donghyuck, filling up his lungs. He doesn't want him to leave. Hyuck seems to agree because he wraps his arms around Lucas waist and sighs contently into the kiss.

He turns them around quickly and almost stumbles caging Hyuck against the brickwall. He takes a second to look. Donghyuck's hair is messy and his cheeks are flushed and lips slightly parted. He knows why he's crushing on him. Hyuck is ethereal.

An impatient tug on his shirt pulls Lucas back into the wet kiss and clashing teeth. He can't surpress smiling into the kiss. Donghyuck is pliant under his fingertips when Lucas licks into his mouth. He enjoys the soft tugs of Donghyuck's small hands in his hair way too much.

He kisses Hyuck's cheeks and down his jaw to his neck. The shaky breaths and soft mewls spurring from Donghyuck's lips encourage him to keep going. He starts biting and sucking there because: yes, he wants to leave his mark. Sucking red and purple bruises that won't fade for at least a week. Make others back off. Which others he doesn't really know. But ya better be safe than sorry.

He's making out. With a boy. Who's also his band mates brother. He doesn't regret a second of it and decides to thank the gods instead for gifting him this opportunity because in this moment right here. He feels like the happiest person on earth.

After what feels like an eternity and not enough at the same time their heated kisses turn into small pecks until they are resting their foreheads against each other, foolish smiles grace their lips. Warmth seeps under his skin from where Hyuck is absent-mindedly caressing the back of his neck.

"Johnny will kill me"  
Lucas grins. Their whispers hushed just between them. Donghyuck laughs too.  
"Johnny will kill you."  
He agrees. And Lucas couldn't care less. He feels content in his own little bubble with Hyuck.

Lucas leans back to properly look Donghyuck in the eyes. He brushes a few strands of hair away from Hyuck's face who smiles contently and leans into the delicate touch of his fingertips.

  
"Go out with me."  
Lucas asks. Donghyuck opens his eyes slowly and starts biting his lip.  
"Aren't you scared?"  
Lucas frowns. What's there to be afraid of?  
"Of Johnny? Nah. At least not enough to stop-"  
"I don't mean Johnny."  
Donghyuck frowns.  
"I'm a boy, Lucas."

  
Lucas just laughs.  
"Yeah I know I'm not dumb."  
Donghyuck groans at the definently dumb reply.  
"I'm serious. Aren't you straight? I don't like being played with okay I don't-"  
Lucas decides a peck is the best way to shut a rambling Hyuck up.  
"There is a thing called being bisexual you know?"

  
Donghyuck just gives him an unimpressed look and a sarcastic laugh.  
"Haha. It's not funny you asshole."  
Lucas cups his face again and smiles softly.  
"Listen Donghyuck. I really, really, really like you. So please. Go out with me"  
Donghyuck looks stunned for a second but nods slowly.  
"I'll think about it you cheesy bastard."  
And Lucas never felt happier.

"So~" Donghyuck grins as he loops his arms around Lucas neck. He leans in close and brushes their lips together as he continues.  
"You wanna continue this in my room? "  
It's less a question and more of a statement. Especially because Donghyuck looks at him with a mischievous glint in his eyes and ducks under his arms bolting inside the house.

Lucas stays rooted in place for a few seconds until he decides it's safe to follow. His whole body is buzzing as he presses through the crowds and practically runs up the narrow staircase.

Donghyuck's room is easy to find. The three bedrooms of the seo siblings are easy to tell apart by their doors. Yeri's room has her name spelled on it in self-made, glitter lettering. Johnny's bedroom has bright yellow caution tape pasted across it. And Donghyuck's bedroom door is littered with several stickers.

Lucas takes a second to look at them closely with a lovestruck smile. A runs his fingers across them- 'Mumford & Sons', 'Two door cinema club' and of course 'Micheal Jackson'. Those are the few he actually has the patience to look at until he decides that what's behind the door is way more tempting.

The sight of a smiley Donghyuck sitting on the bed makes him feel giddy. After he closes the door the music from downstairs became nothing but a dull throbbing. He walks over slowly and when he reaches the bed he bends down to kiss Hyuck pushing him onto his back slowly and crawling after him.

Lucas pulls away. He has Hyuck's head caged between where his forearms are resting on the white sheets. His eyes trail from the soft curls falling around his head like a halo to his sparkling eyes over his luscious lips to the moles on his neck right next to purple hickeys.

"You are beautiful, you know that?"  
He says looking in Donghyuck's eyes. Hyuck just rolls his eyes but giggles a little and turns his head to the side to hide his blush against Lucas's arm.

Soft kisses are pressed along Donghyuck's cheeks and neck. To his nose, forehead and finally on his lips. His small hands caress his face. The moment feels calm and delicate. There are no throbbing heartbeats or uncomfortable butterflies in his stomach anymore. Just the warm buzzing of full satisfaction and happiness.

He rearranges their positions so that they're cuddling on Donghyuck's small bed. He has his head resting on Lucas's arm, one hand lazily thrown over his body and is gazing up at Lucas who has his arm angled to run his fingers through Donghyuck's soft locks. They just smile at each other.

"You know I really wanted to do this since summer."  
Lucas mumbles as he presses a kiss to Donghyuck forehead.  
"Really?"  
Donghyuck crinkles his nose.  
"The heartbreaker and womanizer Wong Lucas has been wanting to kiss me, a mere peasant for more than half a year?"  
he gasps in fake mockery.

"Yeah don't laugh at me. You had me whipped ever since you came back from Canada."  
he tells him. Donghyuck laughes a little and stretches his neck to press a quick kiss to Lucas lips, who hums satisfied with closed eyes.

"Yup. I think I could get used to that."  
Donghyuck hits his chest playfully and Lucas only laughs at the weak hit. When he looks back at Donghyuck, the boy is frowning slightly. He reaches up to brush a feathery touch across the fading bruise under Lucas eye.

"Please-" Donghyuck starts still looking at the bruise  
"Be more careful in the future. I'd be a shame for your handsome face to get ruined."  
Lucas giggles and pinches Hyuck's cheek.  
"Ah don't worry Baby. I'm fine"  
The pet name eases Donghyuck's concerned expression and replaces it with a soft grin. Hyuck yawns and cuddles closer.

"You idiot..."  
Is the only thing he mumbles before closing his eyes.

Lucas stares at the delicate features. The skin glowing where the light of the moon is reaching through the window to caress Hyuck's cheeks. The warm feeling spreading in his chest feels like something he hasn't felt in so long. Belonging and maybe even... home.

Lucas feels Donghyuck's breath evening out slowly.  
"Hey~ Hyuckie, Baby let's get you out of the jacket and shoes okay?"  
He pulls away slowly and sits himself and Donghyuck up who just grumbles groggily at being woken up. Lucas smiles at the precious sight of Hyuck fighting to keep his eyes open.

  
"C'mon help me a little here"  
He orders, peeling the big jacket off of Donghyuck's shoulders. Immediantly after that Hyuck flops onto the bed again earning him a huff from Lucas. He pulls the red high tops from Hyuck feet revealing socks with sunflowers littered over them. Cute.

Lucas himself discards his Jean jacket and black hoodie only leaving a white shirt. He moves Huyck to the wall and lays down behind him wrapping his arms around the small statue and covering them with the crisp white blanket. The rhythmic thumping of club music and Donghyuck even breaths lull him to sleep.


	2. Hopeless Wanderer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is soft  
> Uwu  
> My babies

The first rays of sunlight filter through the blinds and dip the white sheets in a dim, rich glow, so bright that one could think they're orange instead. Lucas blinks his eyes open slowly. His limbs feel heavy and his eyes dry. He rubs the sleep out of them and squints around the room. His eyes trail over the melted candles and small cacti on the windowsill right next to the bed. There are polaroids taped to the wall. Some of them of Donghyuck with Johnny or with other boys, probably his friends. His gaze drifts further until it lands on Donghyuck's frame. A grey shirt is loosely hanging from his hunched shoulders leaning against the crisp walls. There is pair of round specks placed on his small nose and his eyes are immersed in a book lying on his lap. Lucas sits up slowly and crawls over trying to be as quiet as possible. Hyuck realises he is awake only when Lucas is right next to him reaching out and taking off his glasses. He stretches his arm to place them on the windowsill and leans forward at the same time. Just as their lips are about to touch Donghyuck clamps a hand over Lucas mouth.  
"Don't even try. You haven't brushed your teeth yet."  
Lucas tries his best puppy dog eyes but Donghyuck's hand remained over his lips. Donghyuck smiles a little and leans forward to peck Lucas cheek. This is the best he gets? Seriously? No. Unacceptable. 

Lucas grabs Donghyuck's wrist and pulls it off his mouth. He grabs his hips and pulls Hyuck from his position so that he is lying beneath him with a quick tug. He settles between his legs and Donghyuck glares.  
"Wong"  
He starts threatening.  
"Don't even try you overgrown puppy or I swear-"  
Is all he can press out before Lucas surges forward to prepper kisses all over his face holding it in place with both his hands.  
"Lucas!"  
Donghyuck struggles although laughing. But Lucas doesn't stop. He starts tickling Hyuck's neck with fleeting kisses overwhelming bliss rushing through his veins at the elighted giggles. 

The door is being wrenched open stopping Hyuck mid laugh.  
"Ey Hyuck Johnny's been yelling if you-"  
Yeri enters and stares at them. Her mouth falls open and her eyes are wide. Lucas feels his stomach dropping and blood rushing in his ears.  
"....... wanted to have some breakfast...."  
She finishes still shocked. Heavy silence falls over the room. 

'Okay calm down Lucas.' he thinks to himself. 'Worst case scenario: Donghyuck will freak out and never kiss you again. Best case: Yeri is blind.'  
But she isn't and their position must look more than compromising. Donghyuck laying under Lucas who is cradling his face still. They're screwed. Yeri's expression morphs from shell-shocked to a devilish grin that is so similar to Donghyuck's but still so different. She leans against the doorframe and crosses her arms.  
"Morning Wong."  
She grins. He feels Donghyuck squirming underneath him. He swallows nervously nods at her in greeting.  
"I was going to ask if you wanted breakfast but I see you'd much rather eat Johnny's friend's face."  
Donghyuck scowls at her.  
"Yah-"  
But Yeri just lifts her hand.  
"Chill. I'm definently not going to tell Johnny. But only because you covered for me when I snuck out last week."  
Lucas let's out a relieved sigh and looks at Donghyuck who has his eyes trained on his sister and just nods dumbly.  
"Okay guys~ I'll leave you to it then~"  
She turns around to saunter out the door but glances over her shoulder once more.  
"Don't forget protection baby brother~"  
She singsongs and Hyuck yanks a pillow after her that only hits a quickly closed door and falls to the floor with a pathetic thud. 

"Fucking hell... "  
Donghyuck mumbles under his breath and let's himself fall back on the mattress running his hands over his face. Lucas doesn't know what to say. Should he say anything at all? Maybe apologize?  
"I'm sorry..."  
he decides on mumbling. Donghyuck looks at him and his expression softens immediantly.  
"Don't be."  
He reaches up and cups Lucas face.  
"Yeri is chill. We don't rat each other out about romantic partners. We both know how protective Johnny gets. It's fine."  
A grin almost splits Lucas face in half. He tilts his head.  
"Romantic Partner, huh?"  
Donghyuck stares at him blankly.  
"That's all you got from that statement?"  
Lucas just shrugs shamelessly. 

He decides that his arms are getting too tired from holding his weight up. So he just let's his body drop on top of Hyuck's and presses a kiss to his temple. Donghyuck however is groaning and wheezing.  
"Goddamnit you giant. You're crushing me!"  
Hyuck complains through labored breaths. Lucas grabs him and rolls them over almost falling off the small bed in the process. He smiles and kisses the tip of Hyuck's nose. The boy rolls his eyes fondly and rests his cheek on his hand to stare down at Lucas.  
"Who knew the legendary womanizer Wong Lucas is such a clingy baby."  
he teases. Lucas huffs. He is slightly annoyed.  
"Don't talk about me like that..."  
he pouts and looks at Hyuck.  
"I only have eyes for you my babyyy-"  
Lucas starts squishing Donghyuck's cheeks together and gushing. Hyuck swats his hand away.

"You are though, aren't you? You've been with a lot of girls."  
Hyuck frowns. Jealousy may look cute on him but happiness looks better, Lucas decides.  
"Not going to lie. Yes I have."  
The frown between Hyuck's eyebrows deepens and he attempts to get up but Lucas winds his arms around him tighter.  
"But not like this. With them it was always physical. Sexual attraction. Never as a boyfriend or girlfriend. With you however-"  
He looks in Donghyuck's eyes who just tilts his head in confusion. Lucas tries to convey as much honesty and as much sincerity as humanly possible.  
"-it's different. I dont even know. But you make me feel funny Seo Donghyuck."  
Said boy just smiles a little at that and let's his head fall to rest against Lucas body.  
"You make me feel funny too..."  
Is the adorably muffled reply.

"What about you?"  
Lucas asks. Yes, he is curious who Hyuck dated before. He can get a little jelly too...  
"What about me?"  
Is Donghyuck's expected smart-ass reply.  
"Any former girlfriends? boyfriends? Some other..."  
He looks for the right words but can't seem to figure them out. Turns out he doesn't need to because Hyuck understands.  
"No... I mean I've kissed people before but nothing- like that..."  
He says with a blush tinting his cheeks. Is it bad that Lucas feels happy about that answer?  
"How come a boy like you never had a boyfriend or girlfriend?"  
He asks. Donghyuck just shrugs.  
"Because I have a protective, intimidating brother."  
He states.  
"How come you don't have one?"  
He asks instead. Lucas gives him a wolfish grin.  
"You have a protective, intimidating brother."  
Donghyuck just laughs at the flirty remark and swats his hand against Lucas chest. He tilts his head again, a nervous smile forming on his lips.  
"You could change that you know."  
Is the cheeky reply. Lucas decides to play along.  
"Oh and how could I do that, may I ask?"  
Donghyuck huffs a laugh and says:  
"You know I could hook you up with one of my friends."  
Lucas pouts.  
"Nooooo!" he whines.  
"I only want you to be my boyfriend." he keeps whining. Wrapping his arms and legs around Donghyuck to hug him as tight as he can. Hyuck starts wheezing again.  
"Okay fine! fine!"  
He coughs out. Lucas loosens his grip.  
"Take me out and I'll consider it."  
He states. Lucas is more than eager and nods in agreement.  
"Are you free next Friday?"  
He asks. Donghyuck pretends to be in deep thought and scratched his chin as an exaggerated gesture.  
"Yeah I think I can make some time for you."  
He says as he finally grins down at Lucas. He feels on top of the world. Is this real? It feels real.…  
"Friday it is then."

Loud knocking interrupts them again. Donghyuck's eyes widen and he looks at Lucas holding a finger to his lips. Lucas nods.  
"Who is it?"  
Hyuck asks tentatively.  
"Johnny." is the muffled reply. Donghyuck's head snaps back to Lucas mouthing 'fuck'. He scarmbles off the bed and pulls Lucas after him. Careful as to not make too much noise.  
"I just wanted to know if you wanted some breakfast?"  
He throws Lucas jacket and sweater at him and pushes him towards the window. Lucas looks at him in horror.  
"out there??" he whisper-yells at Donghyuck who just nods frantically and keeps pushing him.  
"yes don't be a baby." he whispers back.  
"Hyuck? Are you okay? Can I come in?"  
They stare at each other with even wider eyes.  
"Uuuh yeah I'm fine!" Lucas climbs halfway through the window and looks down. He will have to jump on the canopy first to get to the ground. He prays to the gods that he won't break a leg jumping down there.  
"Just give me a second!" Donghyuck yells in direction of the door. They both look at each other and realise how hilarious this situation is. They laugh quietly. Lucas purses his lips. Hyuck rolls his eyes but immediantly stands on his tiptoes to kiss him. He pushed Lucas onto the canopy right after. What betrayal! Lucas decides as he tries to land as gracefully as possible. There is still a loud thump.  
"Oh my God are you okay? What was that? " he hears Johnny's worried voice.  
"I'm coming in now!"  
And Lucas has no choice but to duck down and press his body against the wall below the window.  
"Are you okay?" he can hear Johnny's voice clearer now.  
"uh yes I'm fine. Just stubbed my toe?"  
Donghyuck tells his brother to excuse the loud noise Lucas made landing on the canopy. He clamps a hand over his mouth to stop the laughing that erupts in his stomach at the pure absurdity of this.  
"Okay..." Johnny sounds uncertain.  
"Anyways I made pancakes so I wanted to know if-"  
And suddenly Johnny stops talking. Lucas frowns. What is going on in there? Is he going deaf? Are they okay. Why is Johnny quiet all of sudden? Mid sentence. He almost thinks they died in there when a sudden yell almost makes him fall off the roof.  
"WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT ON YOUR NECK?!"  
His neck? Donghyuck's neck? And suddenly Lucas jaw falls open. The hickeys. The fucking hickeys and bite marks littered all over Donghyuck's neck. How did he forget about those? Apparently Donghyuck did too. There are exactly three beats of silence.  
"Uhm..... mosquito bites?"  
Donghyuck tries with a small voice. Johnny is having none of it though.  
"MOSQUITO BITES? DO YOU THINK I'M RETARDED? I KNOW WHAT A FUCKING HICKEY LOOKS LIKE!"  
The yelling makes Lucas cringe. He is so dead. Maybe he should write a testament real quick? His skateboard will go to Mark. His guitar to Johnny. Jaehyun can have the weed stash he keeps at home. His mom can get his mixtapes and vinyls...  
"Oh come on Johnny I'm old enough to make out with someone."  
Hyuck tries to reason.  
"You're a baby!" is Johnny's less loud but just as aggressive reply. Lucas can practically hear Donghyuck rolling his eyes.  
"I'm seventeen." he says.  
"I don't want pancakes you can leave now."  
Donghyuck says in a tense voice. But Johnny's rage isn't over yet.  
"You have these only now which means that someone at the party yesterday must've given them to you. ONE OF MY FRIENDS? WHO WAS IT? TELL ME!"  
the raging brother yells again.  
"Oh fuck off Johnny. You were the one who invited millions of your friends to celebrate your birthday. Now leave!"  
he hears Johnny protesting and Donghyuck huffing. After that a door slammed shut and silence fell over the room. Did he just push his brother out the door? Is Johnny gone?  
"Yah!" he hears another whisper-yell over his head and looks up to see Donghyuck leaning out the window to look at him. Lucas grins sheepishly.  
"Fucking put the hickeys somewhere I can hide them next time you asshole!"  
Lucas swallows hard and smiles nervously.  
"I'm sorry?"  
Donghyuck huffs and frowns.  
"Yeah you should be! Now fuck off."  
Lucas grins and stands up to press another kiss to Hyuck's lips. The tension left his shoulders and his body went lax. Lucas smiled in satisfaction at having calmed down Donghyuck. Even if it's just a little bit. Hyuck gives him a tired smile as they part.  
"I'll call you okay? I still have your number."  
Lucas nods eagerly and hops down onto the yard. He grabs his skateboard from the front porch, waves at Donghyuck who was resting his elbows on the window and scrambles off.

The uneven gravel under his skateboard makes his feet feel tingly from the slight vibration. He can't stop smiling all the way home. The taste of Donghyuck's smile is printed on his lips and the feeling of soft touches carved into his skin. He can't wait for that phonecall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me what yall think


	3. The Wolf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My Bby Lucas is struggling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a little angsty I'm sorry?
> 
> Also SOS I write this instead of doing my assignments and sleep😂

It's Monday and Lucas is in his highest spirits. Which is unusual for him. On a Monday. In the morning. His smiley and happy behavior gets him a lot of confused stares from both Mark and Jaehyun. They tease him too. Asking if he managed to get some after he dissappeared at the party. Apparently they were sober enough to notice. Lucas chooses to just ignore them.

Donghyuck had called him as promised and they spend two hours talking on the phone. He told Lucas about Canada and how he misses the friends he made there. He also told him about the friends he has here and promised to introduce them one day. Lucas told him about his job in exchange and about the movie he just watched. They never ran out of things to talk about and only ended the call because Donghyuck has school today and Lucas insisted he needs at least 8 full hours of sleep. So all in all Lucas is more than happy.

Johnny however had been sulking on the couch ever since practice started. His guitar is resting on his lap. He strums it every few seconds and sighs deeply right after. It seems to be getting on Marks nerves.  
"Dude. What's up with you?" he finally voices the question hanging in the room. Mark has always been like that. Straight forward and honest. If he thinks something is wrong, he'll address it.  
Johnny just sighs again and let's his head fall back.  
"It's Hyuck." oh no "I saw.... Hickeys on his neck after the party. We fought. He hasn't talked to me since."  
Lucas feels bad. He doesn't want to be part of the reason why the brothers fight. He doesn't want Johnny to be upset. But what can he do? He can't just switch off his feelings. He's human too.  
"So what? He's old enough isn't he?"  
Jaehyun says. Which is the most stupid thing he could've done in this situation. But Jaehyun isn't the best in acknowledging situations in which it would be better to just shut the fuck up. Johnny sits up abruptly and glares at him.  
"No! He's a baby!" Johnny states.  
"I don't want him to get involved with some bitch who's just going to use him!"  
And Lucas swallows. A bitch? Not really.... And he'd never use Donghyuck! The boy is too precious to him.  
"It was probably Lina! Or Dorothea! She's been whoring around with a lot of nerds lately. Maybe she has a virginity kink or something?"  
Lina? Dorothea? No. Johnny really couldn't be more wrong. But that's good right? Lucas isn't suspicious, right? Is he too quiet? Is he too happy? What if he accidently slips up and tells Johnny? He looks over at his band mates.  
Now it's Mark's turn to glare.  
"Hey don't talk about them like that. It's disrespecting. They're our friends."  
Mark adjusts the settings for the stereo. His bass hanging around his shoulders.  
"I don't want him to be involved with them."  
Johnny stubbornly crosses his arms like a child throwing a tantrum.  
Mark is clenching his fists.  
"Well frankly it's not your choice to make. Donghyuck can hang around whoever he pleases to."  
And then, it's quiet. The tension in the air is so thick that one could cut it with a knife. Lucas thinks that every second they might snap and pounce at each other. Jaehyun clears his throat awkwardly.  
"We should just start practice."  
And Lucas agrees now. He wants this argument to be over.  
"Yeah guys. We have a gig in three weeks."

Practice is tense. Mark's bass sounds off key and Johnny keeps missing his cue which is frustrating. Jaehyun apparently gave up. He is now playing random beats on the drums while Mark and Johnny are occupied with arguing about whose fault it is that they sound like shit. They don't really have time to slack of right now. Their next big gig in three weeks is a great opportunity. They'll perform at a festival. There will be agents, musicians or even record label owners. They have to be good- no they have to be perfect. It's their dream after all. It's not like the fight will be on for much longer. Tomorrow Mark and Johnny probably will have forgotten about the petty fight and they'll continue as normal. It's been 5 years since they founded Pauper Lions and there has never been a fight for longer than 2 days. They'll be fine. But still. The time they're losing is precious.

-

"Taeyong! Please!"  
Lucas begs his boss. They are currently fixing a Kia that is so old, I'd probably be cheaper to just buy a new car instead of getting it fixed every few months.  
"I need to borrow your pickup for tomorrow!"  
Taeyong huffs and pulls himself from where he was laying under the car. He looks at Lucas with a raised eyebrow clearly unimpressed.  
"What do you need it for anyways?"  
Taeyong rubs the little stain motoroil from his cheeks with his sleeve.  
"I'm not giving you my car just so you can hook up with some girl."  
Lucas groans. Why is Taeyong so stubborn?  
"But Tae it's not like that!" he tries to explain. His boss just gives him another unimpressed look and stands up to make his way over to the locker room. Lucas scrambles after him.

"Taeyong. My dude. My pal. I have a date on Friday!"  
Taeyong slams his locker shut and let's his head fall against it. Lucas turns him around, holds him in place by the shoulders and locks their eyes.  
"Please." he says more quiet now.  
"I really like him and don't want to pick him up on a skateboard..."  
Taeyong looks confused.  
"him? A boy?"  
Lucas nods carefully. Taeyong is a great guy but he doesn't know what his view on homosexuality is. Will he fire him if he thinks Lucas is disgusting for liking a boy? Can he do that? Taeyong shrugs his hands off and for a second Lucas thinks he's going to punch him.  
"Didn't know you swing that way."  
Tae says instead and shrugs slightly.  
"Well apparently I swing both ways..."  
Lucas offers in a small voice. He shifts his weight from one foot to the other. Taeyong just nods and then it's quiet. Lucas scratches the back of his neck. It's almost unbearable. The silence feels deafening to his ears. And finally Taeyong says something.  
"Tell me about him."  
He asks. Already turning to walk back to the cars. Lucas stays rooted in place with a gaping mouth. That's it? Taeyong turns when he sees Lucas doesn't move and motions for him to follow.  
"While working of course."  
And Lucas can only nod dumbly and scurry after his boss.

Back in the garage Taeyong opens the bonnet of a muddy Hyundai. They got it a week ago but couldn't seem to figure out what's wrong with it. They are getting frustrated. Taeyong braces his hands against the car and stares at it. His eyes scan the inside of the car for maybe 10 seconds before his body jerks and he grabs wrench from the working table to his left and starts working.  
"Lucas please check our orders for repair parts. We'll try switching the battery in this one. I know it sounds too easy but maybe it works..."  
Lucas nods and turns to sit at the counter.  
"Yeah sure."

He is looking though the folders searching for their list of orders for this month. He knows he put it somewhere here. Maybe the green folder?  
"So Lucas-"  
He jumps a little at Taeyong cutting the silence all of sudden.  
"- tell me about that boy."  
He says without looking up. Lucas thinks for a second. Where should he start? There is so much to say about Donghyuck.  
"well.... What do you wanna know?"  
Lucas opts for asking. He looks up at his boss who just shrugs slightly.  
"I don't know? Like how'd you meet?"  
Lucas scratches his chin and keeps flipping through the pages of the folder.  
"Well, he's the brother of one of my bandmates. I've known him since I was 16. He was in Canada for a year on a scholarship."

He finally finds the goddamn list of orders for the month! He takes a pen and sets it down to add the battery for the Hyundai. He glances up and sees that Taeyong stopped working to lean against the car, a soft smile turning up the corners of his lips.  
"What?"  
Lucas asks carefully. His boss laughs a little.  
"A scholarship for a year abroad in Canada? A smart one I see."  
Lucas feels pride swell in his chest and a smile creeping to his lips.  
"Yes he is! He's super clever and witty. He is sooo beautiful too."  
Taeyong nods and huffs a laugh.  
"I see. So you are whipped for the boy that you punched a guy for about a week ago. The cute one with the bleeding nose."

Right. He met Donghyuck before. Briefly but they met. Taeyong scratches his chin and frowns slightly in deep thought.  
"What was his name again? Dooyoon? Dongyoon?"  
"Donghyuck. His name is Donghyuck."  
Taeyong snaps his fingers.  
"Right. That was it. It was hard to miss that you are.... infatuated? with him. I mean you are the softest person I know. You wouldn't get into a fight for anyone. I just always thought you were... you know.... veeery hetero"  
Right. He was. But Donghyuck is different. And it's not bad to like him, right? He was sure. So sure when he kissed Donghyuck. When he was close to him but now? Judgment is cruel and Lucas cares about Taeyong's opinion. He wants him to approve of Hyuck. Because he knows his dad won't, the band won't and most importantly- Johnny won't. Ever.

Taeyong wipes his stained hands on his pants. He walks over to the counter and pulls a chair to sit next to Lucas.  
"Hey don't look so down now."  
Taeyong pats his back.  
"He must be very special, huh?"  
He rubs comforting circles on Lucas back. He hums.  
"He is. I like him so much! He is amazing! He makes me feel at ease. For him, I want to be the best I can. But people are cruel, Yong. I shouldn't care but it's -"  
the words get caught up in his throat. Everything should be great, right? He has a date with the boy of his dreams. He should be ecstatic. And while he is anticipating their date he also feels weird.  
"Scary?"  
Taeyong offers. Lucas let's his head hang low and nods. His shoulders are hunching like they have to carry enormous weights. Other people's expactations feel heavy.  
"You know what I think, Lucas?"  
Taeyong leans back in his chair and continues talking softly.  
"If you really like or even love someone, and you're good for each other, it really doesn't matter who they are. Because at the end of the day those who care for you and truly love you, will be happy for you no matter what. There are always asshole out there. It's best to just- ignore them."  
Taeyong shrugs at the end of his speech. As if it is the easiest thing in the world. Maybe it is and Lucas just makes things hard for himself?  
"I guess you're right..."  
Taeyong is wise after all. He always has been. Lucas's fear of his reaction seemed irrational now. Taeyong is the nicest guy he knows. He offered Lucas a job, here at the garage, even though he had no qualifications. Taeyong knew that Lucas needed the money to pay their rent, to help his mother out because apparently his dad won't do just that. Lucas owes him for that. Taeyong feeds the stray kittens every week. He tries to repair that goddamn Hyundai because he knows the owner can't afford a new car. He is kind. And Lucas feels stupid for thinking he'd react badly.

A hand stretches out in front of his face. He follows the length of a bony arm and looks Taeyong who just sighs at Lucas confused expression.  
"Open your hand." he says. Lucas frows but does as he's told anyways. A key drops into the palm of his hand. His eyes grow wide and he gapes at Taeyong who just rolls his eyes.  
"I will fire you if you dent my baby." he warns. Lucas jumpes up to pull his boss in a bone crushing hug an endless stream of 'thank you! 's falling off his lips. Taeyong pets his hair hesitantly.  
"There there. Have a lot of fun with Donghyuck, okay?"  
Lucas nods eagerly.

-

It's already pitch black outside when he arrives home. He still lives with his parents. He doesn't have siblings to live with like Johnny or his own flat like Mark and Jaehyun, even though they're small. He just couldn't bear the thought of leaving his mother alone with the sad excuse of a father. She loves that asshole too much. She'd become his punching bag! He can't let that happen.

He peels off his worn out boots and stretches, several bones cracking. His dad must be at the bar. He didn't see his car outside.  
"Mom?" he calls.  
"I'm in the kitchen honey!" his mother replies. His mom is cooking at the oven when he enters. She is a petit woman, way too skinny to be healthy. But her soft smile never fades. No matter how bad her husband gets. He walks over and gives her a kiss on the forehead.  
"Hello Lucas." she smiles and asks:  
"Do you mind helping me cut the leek?"  
But Lucas is already washing his hands and grabbing said vegetable. He likes helping her cook. It's calm. Almost normal. They just work in silence for a while.

As they set the table Lucas mother stumbles and drops the glass bowl with the salad making it break apart into millions of tiny pieces with a loud crash. They both look at the pieces of glass spread over the kitchen tiles. It's quiet for a few beats before she gasps and falls to her knees to pick up the pieces frantically. Lucas bends down too to stop her.  
"Mom. Stop." he carefully cradles her hands in his.  
"You're going to cut yourself." he reasons in a calm voice. His mother looks at him and for a moment she look relaxed. The tension is leaving her shoulders and Lucas is about to stand up to just grab a broom and clean up real quick. It should've been fine. No big deal. That is until the front door kicks open and plain panic seeps into her expression. His dad stumbles into the kitchen. He is swaying in his steps and has to hold himself against the doorframe. Definently the bar. He can smell the bourbon from sitting on the floor. His dad's expression sours when he sees the mess.  
"What the hell?" he slurrs slightly.  
"You dumb bitch can't even prepare dinner. Look at the mess!" he accused Lucas's mom. She looks like she is close to tears so Lucas speaks up.  
"It's my fault. Mom just wanted to go to the bathroom to refresh herself, right?" he tries desperately. But his mother looks at him with wide eyes and shakes her head slightly.  
"Lucas, honey no-"  
"Mom." he urges her sternly.  
"Leave. Now." he pulls her up and pushes her in direction of the kitchen door. She tries to protest but really doesn't have a chance but to leave when her husband yells at her.  
"YEAH LEAVE. I HAVE TO PUNISH THIS USELESS IDIOT YOU CALL SON!"  
Lucas rolls his eyes inwardly. The words don't even hurt him anymore. But his mom. He knows she'll cry and feel guilty. But he just wants to protect her.

His dad stumbles forward to Lucas and swings the first hit. Lucas head snaps to the side.  
"You really are pathetic."  
The man slurrs as he grabs Lucas collar. The second hit is kind of painful, right on his cheekbone. But it's the same old. His dad gets home hammered and beats one of them for the most irrational mistakes. It's not even shocking anymore at this point. He only resents having to see his mom cry.

So he takes the beating knowing his father will pass out soon anyways. It's become kind of predictable by now. Lucas used to think about just running away or fighting back but... his mom. She's too good. She'd let that asshole hurt her. He doesn't want that.

-

He lays in bed that night with the volume of his music turned to the highest setting. His body is dully aching and throbbing. Lucas's eyes feel heavy. Maybe he should sleep? His dad passed out on the sofa after beating him up. Lucas patched the cut on his nose up. He also has a bruise blooming on his left cheekbone. His mom is sobbing in the bathroom. Again. It always ends like this. The guilt and fear eating her away. The blackness and hopeless is swallowing everything that's left of her until there's nothing left but an empty shell of the woman she once was. He hates it. It makes his heart ache. He just can't bear hearing her cries. So he concentrates on the beats.

'Bing!'

The shrill sound rings through his bedroom. He reaches onto his mattress patting it to find the device. Lucas lifts his phone to squint at it. He shoots into seating position after reading the contact name.

_Hyuckie_  
_Hey! You still up for tomorrow?_

Lucas has to smile. Of course he is. He planned out their whole date already. Lucas starts typing away, a happy warthm spreading in his chest.

_Lucas_  
_Of course! When is your last period finished?_

_Hyuckie_  
_At 2 pm, why?_

_Lucas_  
_I'll come pick you up! I borrowed my bosses car!_

_Hyuckie_  
_The scary one?_

_Lucas_  
_He ain't scary! He's a biiiiig softie!_

_Hyuckie_  
_Okay Wong, see you tmrw._

_Lucas_  
_See ya!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ❗❗I want to Thank you all for the lovely comments! They are my motivation to keep writing! Love you all! Your feedback really helps. ❤️❤️❤️


	4. Babel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They're on a date!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who's back

It's 2.20 pm and Lucas is waiting at the school gate. He knows Hyuck only finishes at 2.30 pm but he left home extra early to make sure he'll be there on time. It's still ten minutes until Hyuck's last period finishes and Lucas is already sweating buckets. He's never been like this. Usually when he's meeting -well girls he's smooth, relaxed and way less awkward than he is now. It's just not like him. Lucas rubs his sweaty hands on his jeans. He looks at his phone. It's 2.24 pm? Is the time going slower than usual? Why does the universe have to make it so nerve wrecking? 

Lucas inspects the building. It's been a couple of years since he's been here but nothing really changed. It still has the same wistful ambience. The schoolyard is still littered with food wrappers and plastic bottles. The faded orange walls are still cracked. The windows are still smeared and dirty. It's slightly unsettling how even after five years, time seems to have stopped for the school. God is he glad he's done with all this shit. The teachers couldn't care less if they made it. Some even wished for their failure. Lucas never was on top of his classes. He didn't have the money to get a tutor or the time to study all day. He had to work hard to even pay their rent. One teacher had seemed to take pleasure in giving him detention and hence made him late for work. He once gave Lucas detention for breathing too loud and disturbing class. Who even does that? So yeah, high school doesn't really hold his fondest memories except for maybe meeting the guys and founding the Pauper Lions.

The shrill ring makes a discomforting feeling settle in his stomach and pulls him out of his reminiscence.

But wait. How is he even going to greet Donghyuck? Wave? Hug him? Kiss him? What if it'll be weird. Do Donghyuck's friends know he is going out with Lucas. Probably. He is not a coward like himself. He probably has the guts to tell his friends. So it'd be fine to kiss him, right? It's not like they haven't done that before. But they're in public so maybe he should just go for a hug? No it's a date. A kiss would be better. Wouldn't it? Mayday! Mayday! Lucas doesn't know what to do on real dates! He's never been on one!

His nervous heartbeat starts hammering almost painfully against his chest as he spots Donghyuck walking out the door, talking animately with some other boys. A hug? They walk across the yard and Donghyuck turns his head. A kiss? His eyes light up when he spots Lucas. A hug? He waves a little and walks straight towards him. A kiss? Will that be awkward? Donghyuck is standing in front of him now. He steps closer puts a hand up to pull Lucas face down slightly and stands on his tiptoes to kiss his lips. 

... Right. This is Donghyuck. He always knows what he is doing. It won't ever be awkward. It never gets weird with him. 

"Hey!" Hyuck grins at him. Lucas heartbeat slows into a more comfortable pace. He breathes out a soft 'Hi' as well. They look at each other for a moment. Donghyuck's doe eyes are glowing amber in the afternoon sun. A happy spark ignites in Lucas chest. 

"Oh my Hyuckie you scored yourself one!"  
The teasing voice snaps Lucas attention away from the boy in front of him to glance over Donghyuck's shoulder. There are standing three boys. Two of them look rather amused. The third boy stands there with bright pink hair and a slightly evil grin gracing his lips. Donghyuck groans and turns around.  
"Shut up Nana! You're just salty cause you're single."  
Donghyuck replies. He looks cute like this. Lips pursed and hands on his side. The boy, Nana apparently, huffs.  
"Rude! But true." 

A small boy in comparison to the other two smiles at Lucas.  
"Hello. I'm Renjun. This is Jeno and that one is Jaemin or well- Nana."  
He explains in a way that sounds so much more mature than his tiny frame makes him out to be. Lucas smiles back.  
"Hello. I'm Lucas." he offers.  
"Oh so we've heard!"  
Nana or Jaemin or whatever his name is perks up. Donghyuck swats his arm and hisses something in his direction that Lucas can't quite make out.  
"Okay we'll go now."  
Renjun says as he and Jeno hook their arms with Jaemin to pull him away. Renjun elbows Jaemin who is about to protest. He gives Lucas a tight smile.  
"It was nice meeting you."  
Jeno who's been quiet until now nods at the two of them and smiles too.  
"See you on Saturday Hyuck. Ask Lucas if he wants to come too."  
Donghyuck's shoulders sag in relief and he smiles and waves at his friends.  
"Will do."  
They nod and pull Jaemin away who turns his head once more to yell over his shoulder.  
"Bye loverboy~" 

Donghyuck groans again and let's his head fall back before turning to Lucas.  
"I hate them." he whines.  
Lucas just pinches his cheek and laughs.  
"I like them. They're very nice."  
Donghyuck rolls his eyes but hooks their arms and starts walking away from the school grounds.  
"Lead the way to our vehicle of choice for today Mister Wong." Donghyuck says with a dramatic voice.  
"Of course Mister Seo."  
Lucas replies and leads them to Taeyong's blue pickup. He opens the passenger door for Donghyuck to enter who just looks at him surprised.  
"Oh my! What a gentleman! " he says jokingly as he fans his face with his hands before hopping in. Lucas rounds the car as well to get into the driver's seat. He starts the engine and pulls out of the parking space. Donghyuck leans back in his seat and looks at Lucas.  
"Nice sweater" he says and points at Lucas's black hoodie with their band logo on it. A friend of Johnny, Ten was his name Lucas thinks, is a street artist and designed it for them. They had it printed on a few sweaters and shirts for every member.  
Lucas glances at him and points at Donghyuck's shirt.  
"My chemical romance?" He asks.  
Donghyuck clutches his heart and gasps dramatically.  
"They are the emo boys of my dreams, okay?"  
Lucas laughs at that. Didn't every decent person have that emo phase? He ain't one to judge. He knows the lyrics to 'Teenagers' by heart and could recite them in his sleep.  
"I know it's not the nicest shirt but I like it."  
Donghyuck tells him. Lucas scoffs. Donghyuck looks amazing in anything. He could probably wear a potato sack and still look like he came of the runway. Maybe he's a little biased but that's not the point!  
"You look beautiful."  
He reaches over to grab Hyuck's hand and kisses it.  
"Just like you always do."  
It's quiet for a few seconds. The exact moment Lucas turns to look at Hyuck he bursts out laughing.  
"Oh my God Lucas! What kind of kdrama is this!"  
He manages to get out before starting to break out in maniacal giggles again. Lucas is slighty offended. He is great flirt, okay? He tries to pull away but Hyuck holds his hand tight in both of his.  
"Hey" he giggles.  
"Don't be offended I like your cheesy ass." he says as he presses a small kiss to Lucas hand too. 

"So where are we going today?" Donghyuck asks curiously. Lucas smiles and glances at him. He shrugs nonchalantly.  
"Oh you know. I thought we should go to the pier. The funfair."  
Donghyuck shoots up to sit straight and squeezes Lucas hand.  
"Really? I've never been!" he almost yells into Lucas ear. He feels content at Hyuck approving of his choice. He had wanted to do something fun. Not go to the cinema or some shit. He wants to make their first date unforgettable. 

But suddenly Hyuck slumps back into his seat and loosens his hands around Lucas's.  
"But Lucas, the tickets are expensive."  
He says and it sounds flat. Almost disappointed. Lucas caresses Donghyuck's tiny hands with his thumb in order to calm him.  
"Relax. My cousin works there. He gets discount so I asked him to buy me two tickets."  
Donghyuck still sits sunken deeply onto the passenger seat. He sighs:  
"Still Lucas. You shouldn't spend so much money."  
They slowly come to halt at a red light. Lucas turns to Donghyuck and holds his face, forcing the boy to look him im the eyes.  
"Just let me spoil you for today. It's really not that expensive."  
Hyuck searches around his face for something. Lucas doesn't know what but he seems to have found it because he sighs and smiles softly. Hyuck leans forward to peck his lips.  
"Fine." he whispers.  
Lucas smiles too and nods. They both jump at a car honking loudly behind them. Lucas glances ahead and quickly starts his car when he sees the light is already green.

-

Hyuck excitedly hops out the car and stretches his limbs. Lucas smiles at him through the window. The afternoon sun makes his tan skin glow like warm honey and the auburn mop of hair appears bright orange in the light. Lucas gathers his wallet and phone and hops out of the car.

The air at the beach seems clearer than in the city. Lucas takes a deep breath and feels the fresh salty air fill his lungs. He can see the ferriswheel and rollercoaster on the peir from where they parked the car. 

They stroll along the small shops littering along the shore. Lucas is a little dizzy from walking this close to Hyuck. The scent that is distinctly Donghyuck wafting around him and their shoulders brushing softly against each other. He feels content like this.

"Are you perhaps free tomorrow evening?"  
Donghyuck asks still looking ahead. Lucas turns to him. They have practice tomorrow and he promised to help Taeyong move his new couch but other than that he should be free in the evening.  
"Sure" he says.  
"Why do you ask?"  
Donghyuck just shrugs slightly. He's still not looking in Lucas's direction.  
"Oh you know there's this party tomorrow at Renjun's place."  
Lucas raises his eyebrow and smirks.  
"And you want me to come?"  
Donghyuck shrugs again and looks at the gravel below their feet.  
"If you want to. His parents are kinda loaded so they have this great pool and we could sleep there so we don't have to go home in the middle of the night-" he starts rambling while wringing his hands. Lucas decides to interrupt him.  
"I'd love to go."  
Finally Donghyuck glances at him but immediantly looks back ahead.  
"Cool."  
He nods to himself and folds his hands behind his back. It's kind of endearing, Lucas thinks, because Donghyuck has no reason at all to be nervous. Lucas likes to take every chance they'll get to spend time together. Just like he'll enjoy every single second they have today. 

-

Did he say he would enjoy this? He was so wrong! Why did he take Hyuck to a place with all kinds of pacing rollercoasters and crazy rides? Lucas feels like he is about to throw up since the third or so ride. But he just can't say no when Hyuck asks him to go on another one with big, brown puppy dog eyes. His stomach flipped upside down on the last spinning ride they were on. He was literally gagging as they got off. 

He looks at Donghyuck who is smiling brighter than the sun with a childlike sparkle in his eyes. Lucas decided that maybe he can take a little nausea if Donghyuck looks this delighted. 

"Come on Lucas! I wanna ride the one over there next."  
Donghyuck grabs Lucas's hand to pull him into the direction of a swaying and spinning ride that's too bright for his eyes with flashy pink and green neon lights. Lucas groans.  
"I am gonna throw up." he begs and strains against Hyuck's pull. He turns around and huffs.  
"Don't be a big baby Lucas. It'll be fine!"  
He turns again and starts tugging on Lucas's hand. Lucas decides that he had enough. He surges forward to wrap his arms around Hyuck, successfully trapping his arms. He rest his head on Hyuck's shoulder who is struggling in his hold but gives up when he notices that Lucas simply won't let go. Donghyuck sighs.  
"You clingy Baby."  
Lucas smiles but kisses his cheek.  
"Yeah but I'm your clingy baby."  
Donghyuck blushes but smiles.  
"Yeah whatever. You wanna grab something to eat?"  
Lucas perks up in excitement and nods enthusiastically. 

So they end up splitting for a moment. Lucas is getting churros for them while Hyuck went to grab them something to drink. He pays the man who looks more than done with working here and grabs the two packs of churros.  
"Lucas?" a voice asks.  
He jumps and turns around quickly.

…Mark. Mark. MARK?! He chokes on his own spit and starts coughing violently. Mark being the kind soul he is starts apologizing for scaring him and pats his back. Lucas tries to get a grip.  
"Mark, my Dude. What are you doing here?"  
He tries to sound nonchalant but his voice is wavering. If Mark hears it he doesn't comment on it.  
"Oh I'm out with the girl I told you about."  
He says and motions in direction of a girl with brown hair sitting at a bench. Lucas and Mark both turn to looks at her. She smiles and waves at them when she notices. Lucas awkwardly smiles back.  
"Uh congrats Bro.…" he presses out with a rather forced smile.

He sees Donghyuck walking in their direction with two lemonades in his hands. They lock eyes and Lucas subtly nods his head in direction of Mark who's still smiling at the girl. Donghyuck's eyes widen and he points in direction of the exit. Lucas nods as unnoticeable as possible. A silent agreement that they'll meet outside. He quickly looks back at Mark as his friend turns to him again.  
"So why are you here? A secret girlfriend you're hiding from us?" Mark laughs.  
More like a secret almost-boyfriend. Lucas tries to laugh along. His body feels tense.  
"Ha funny... Eh no actually I was- uhm here with a friend from work but he... uh had to leave."  
Mark nods with a slight frown. Lucas has to get out of this situation.  
"Yeah actually I was about to leave as well I just wanted to grab some food." he waves around the churros in his hands while slowly retreating backwards.  
"Don't leave your girl waiting! Bye Mark." he manages before quickly turning around and leaving. He can hear Mark yell a confused 'Goodbye' after him. 

As promised Donghyuck is waiting outside for him. He looks at Lucas in question.  
"Uh it's fine. I told him a I was here with a friend who left already." he tells him  
Donghyuck sighs and his tense shoulder relax. He looks around and then back at Lucas.  
"You want to sit down at the beach to eat?" he asks.  
Lucas nods. They make their way through the already cool sand and sit as close to the waves as possible without getting wet. The peir is now further away. The lights look like little fireflies and the loud chatter and music faded into white noise. They eat in silence for a while. Hyuck looks at him.  
"So since you won't tell me on your own apparently, I have to ask. Why do you have a nasty bruise in your face?" he asks.  
Lucas freezes. His mind flickers back to his dad's ruthless beating but he can't tell Donghyuck that. He'd think he's weak, pathetic, stupid for staying...  
"I just... got into a fight." he decides on mumbling. It's deadly silent for a moment until Hyuck just sighs.  
"You're a shit liar. It's fine if you don't want to tell me but don't lie to me." he hisses. 

Lucas flinches at the harsh tone. Donghyuck is upset about him lying. Of course he is. Honesty is trivial. Lucas hangs his head low and runs a hand through his hair.  
"Sorry..." he mumbles.  
Donghyuck nods and grabs his hand. He's always like that. Blunt and a little rude sometimes but always understanding. He accepts that Lucas can't tell him everything. At least not yet. And that's good. It's so brave and mature that Lucas sometimes wonders if Donghyuck is really 5 years younger than him. 

When Hyuck starts to shiver, Lucas pulls off his Hoodie and hands it over. He blushes violently when Donghyuck smirks at him.  
"Just take it." he rolls his eyes.  
The satisfaction is settling into his body when he sees Donghyuck's small frame being swallowed in Lucas's big black hoodie. 

They decide to head back but walk along the beach. Their hands are still intertwined and Lucas marvels at how soft and small Donghyuck's hands are. They fit perfectly into his. At least he thinks so. As they slowly make their way along the shore with their feet in the water and their shoes in their hands Donghyuck yawns a little. He leans against Lucas's arm and snuggles closer for support and warmth. At this exact moment Lucas asks himself how he ever lived life without having Donghyuck with him like this.

-

They drive through the night their hands still tightly clasped around each other. Donghyuck's palms are slightly sweaty but Lucas finds he doesn't mind. Not if the person attached to the hand is Hyuck.

"Could you please bring me to Jeno's house? Johnny thinks I went there right after school to have a sleepover."  
Lucas nods.  
"Oh how clever you are." he marvels at his almost-boyfriend. Donghyuck grins.  
"I know, I know. I'm a genius." he says and they both laugh. The rest of the ride is calm. The soft tunes of the mighty oaks are ringing through the car. Lucas enjoys this. Just sitting quietly and enjoying each other's presence. It feels wholesome.

If you ask Lucas the ride ended way to fast. After Donghyuck guided him through the neighborhood they're sitting in the car parked in front of Jeno's place.

Donghyuck unfastens his seat belt and starts moving around. Lucas is confused at first until he has a lapful of Donghyuck staring down at him. The warm palms of his hands are rest against Lucas neck, slowly massaging the tense muscles there. Hyuck leans in slowly and ghosts his lips along his ear.  
"Don't you still have a question to ask me?" he whispers. Lucas thinks hard. A question. What could he possib-  
"Be my boyfriend?" he whispers back. A nervous feeling bubbles in his stomach. Donghyuck smiles at him. It's so bright that Lucas forgets he has to breath for a second. That's how beautiful Donghyuck is. How big of an impact he has on Lucas. Donghyuck nods.  
"Yes of course you dork." he chuckles. And Lucas realises, he is probably the happiest man on earth. He is over the moon. His body buzzing. He leans in to kiss his boyfriend. He can still taste the faint aroma of strawberry lemonade on his tongue. Soft lips press against his own and he feels as if he is addicted to this. Addicted to having Donghyuck around him.

He is out of breath when they pull back, both with droopy smiles gracing their faces. Hyuck clears his throat.  
"I'll see you tomorrow then? I'll text you the address ?"  
All words are stuck in Lucas's throat so he just opts for nodding dumbly. Donghyuck laughs and kisses him once more before he opens the door on the driver's side and crawls out of Lucas lap. He smiles at him once more before closing the car door and hurrying to the house. Lucas stays until his boyfriend is safely inside and immediantly starts screaming.  
"YAHA!" he bumps his fist in the air. He has the most perfect and amazing and beautiful boyfriend in the whole world. Donghyuck is his boyfriend. He is Hyuck's boyfriend. Lucas can't process it at all. Happiness is seeping through his pores and setting into every single bone of his body.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry I didn't update in a while.
> 
> I've struggled a little with assignments and work and I didn't sleep well. Also schools been feeding my anxiety. So that's great. 
> 
> Anyways I'm happy I updated now. Sorry again. ❤️


	5. Wilder Minds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wohooo I finally updated! I'm on winter break now so I hope I'll get to write more. ❤️

Lucas pulls up infront of the block of cement that Taeyong calls his home to see him already waiting impatiently on the sidewalk. His boss rolls his eyes and strolls around the pickup to open the door on driver's side. He looks at Lucas with raised eyebrows and frowns when he doesn't butch.  
"Get out." he sighs and jerks his head.  
"I don't want you in my baby any longer than necessary."  
Lucas cringes at the choice of words but promptly gets out. God knows Taeyong is impatient. Lucas rounds the car and sits down on the passenger seat. Taeyong already settled behind the steering wheel with a fond expression. This guy really loves his car too much.

-

Lucas is already exhausted from loading the couch onto the back of the car after they picked it up at the furniture shop downtown. He is so not down for carrying it upstairs. To the fifth floor.

The couch Taeyong picked out is... ugly. The obnoxious, red fabric isn't soft or comfortable. It's itchy and weighs too much. No wonder Taeyong needs help. Lucas muscles are straining already and they are lifting it together!  
He heaves and almost falls onto his ass as climb the stairs with the piece of furniture. Taeyong rolls his eyes and tells him to move his ass. As he said: impatient.

Approximately 45 minutes and several bumps and curses later they flop down on the couch that's now placed in Taeyong's small living room. Lucas back feels damp from sweat and he wriggles around as to not feel the fabric too much. His boss turns his head to look at Lucas.  
"You want a beer?" he asks. Lucas nods.  
"Okay just give me five minutes. I don't think I can stand up yet." Taeyong whines.  
Lucas just laughs. He feels the exact same way. His arms and calves feel sore and worn out and his back is aching from hunching over all the way upstairs. No standing up until necessary. It takes 20 minutes until Taeyong heaves his body from the couch and shuffles into the kitchen. Lucas almost moans when he spots cold beers in Taeyong hands.

The beer feels refreshing and cool. He almost gulps down half of it in one go. They stay quiet for a while. That is until Taeyong perks up.  
"Your hair has gotten pretty long." he wonders.  
Lucas runs a hand through his hair. It has gotten long. His bleached bangs are hanging in his eyes already. Not that he minds but maybe Hyuck does. He should probably get a haircut. He can't look unkempt or messy. Especially tonight. It's the first time he's seeing Donghyuck since he agreed to be his boyfriend. He should look good. Is there a hairdresser nearby? Maybe he can get a haircut before he goes to the party.

"Yuta is coming over in like-" Taeyong turns his wrist to look at his watch.  
"20 minutes. Since we repaired his car for free he's giving me a haircut and he'll dye it brown. I think the red has gotten boring."  
Taeyong sits up and rest his head against his hand. His eyes are glued to the top of Lucas's head.  
"You helped so I thought maybe you'd like a cut too? Maybe a new color?" he says.  
Lucas smiles and nods enthusiastically. That'd be awesome.

-

That's how he finds himself sitting on the edge of Taeyong's bathtub with a smiley Yuta softly massaging black dye onto his scalp and into his locks. Lucas closes his eyes at the relaxing feeling. Taeyong already has bleach in his hair to get the red color out and is lounging on the toilet seat with his phone. Yuta keeps humming the Naruto intro under his breath and at this point Lucas is tempted to join.

The black color was Yuta's idea. He said something about natural being 'in' again and how Lucas will look hot with black hair. So he just shrugged and agreed. As a hairdresser he probably knows what he's doing.

Lucas is waiting for the color to seep into his hair. Taeyong is still scrolling through his phone on the toilet seat. Yuta is reading some fashion magazine where he's perched on the counter of the sink. Lucas is bored so he decides to do what he's best at: annoying others, more specifically his cute boyfriend.

_Lucas_  
_Hey Hyuck!_  
_Should I bring anything tonight?_

It takes a few minutes until a Grey bubble appears to indicate that Hyuck is typing.

_Hyuck_  
_You're 21, right? Alcohol would be nice!_  
_Other than that just yourself ;)_

Lucas can't contain a smile.

_Lucas_  
_Will do. See you tonight!_

_Hyuck_  
_Yeah. Til later Babe._

'Babe' he grins. He really wants to hear Donghyuck call him that more often. He wants to hear the soft voice in real life and not just read it on the screen.

"What's got you smiling at your phone like a lovesick teenager?"  
Yuta asks. Lucas looks up at the bright smile that's thrown his way. Is it okay for him to tell Yuta about Hyuck? His eyes flicker over to Taeyong who looks up from his phone and gives Lucas a soft smile. It'll be fine. Donghyuck told his friends. He kissed him in front of his school. He's brave. He deserves a boyfriend that's not too much of a coward to tell his friends.

Lucas takes a deep breath and rubs his sweaty palms against his pants. He offers a shaky smile.  
"Well..." he says.  
"I was just texting my-" he gulps one more time before pressing out:  
"my boyfriend."  
He surprisingly feels relieved. Like a load has been lifted off of his shoulders. Lucas looks at Yuta warily. For a few beats he looks surprised, almost shocked but after that his smile grows even bigger. Lucas feels the tension melt off his shoulders.  
"Oh, you're together now?"  
Taeyong perks up. Lucas whipped his head around to look at him and just nods stiffly.

Yuta hops off the counter and into the bathtub across from Lucas. The space is too small and he has to awkwardly fold his legs so they can both sit properly. After Yuta settles comfortably, he grins at Lucas and rests his chin on his palm.  
"You have picture?"

The bathroom is quiet. Lucas is sure his expression is more than flabbergasted because Yuta starts giggling at his face. He shakes his head to regain focus and starts scrambling with his phone.  
"Uh yeah sure. Just- wait a second."  
He opens Instagram and types Hyuck's username into the searching bar. They don't follow each other. While on the phone they figured it'd be weird to just follow each other all of sudden. And still the string of letters that make Donghyuck's username are so familiar to him. He found himself too often looking at his profile at night when his mind was clouded with pretty smiles and honey skin. At the time he started crushing on Donghyuck the smiley pictures helped clearing his head when he was stuck in his mini am-i-gay-crisis-?. Not that he'd ever tell Hyuck about stalking his profile. That'd be creepy...

He hands Yuta his phone. The man gladly takes it and starts scrolling through them with calculated eyes. Taeyong suddenly scurries over to them as well. He perches himself on the edge of the bathtub, cranes his neck and looks at the phone as well. Lucas nervously wrings his hands. Why do they examine every single picture?

Yuta's face morphs into a fond smile. He turns the phone to show Lucas one particular picture.  
"Wowie, this one is really pretty."  
Lucas knows the picture. Of course he does. It's a picture of Hyuck sitting on a windowsill. The sunset is peaking out from behind him and illuminates his hair and skin. The bright, natural smile he's wearing is almost contagious. Lucas nods in agreement.  
"Yeah he is."  
Taeyong and Yuta both laugh. They immediantly go back to scrolling through the pictures.

After a while Yuta frowns and tilts his head in confusion. He turns the phone in Lucas's direction once more.  
"Isn't that your band mate?" he asks.  
Lucas looks at the picture again. It's a selca of Johnny and Hyuck taken shortly after he came back from Canada. Lucas winces.  
"Yes it is." he says in a breathy voice.  
"That's kind of the catch. They're brothers. Johnny doesn't know I like boys nevertheless that I'm dating his brother. It's kind of..." he shrugs hopelessly.  
"complicated?" Yuta offers and Lucas can only nod. Taeyong leans forward and pats his back.  
"I'm happy for you." Yuta says thoughtfully, a small smile ghosting his lips.  
"I don't think I've ever seen you so happy when talking about anyone." Yuta shrugs.

Lucas is thankful. Taeyong may not be a man of many words but he's always there to comfort him. And Yuta may not be his closest companion but he's always there to listen and support him. He's incredibly thankful for having them in his life.

-

Yuta knows what he's doing. Lucas looks at himself in the bathroom mirror and can't help but gape. His hair is back to black now which it hadn't been for 2 years and slightly shorter than before. It kind of suits him. Yuta proudly grins at his work. Taeyong's hair turned out great as well. The light brown hair makes him look softer than the vibrant red he had before. Yuta really deserves a raise. He's a brilliant hairstylist.

-

Lucas is not surprised when the address guides him to the good part of town. The facades here are so white that even at night they seem too bright to look at. Maybe he's a little bitter as well. The people living in areas like this don't know what it's like to struggle to pay the rent or what it's like to eat one meal a day just because you can't afford more. But then again maybe he should be glad that the kids here don't have to experience that. And moreover the parties here are way better than where he lives. The alcohol isn't as cheap, the space isn't as tight and the kids aren't as depressed.

Lucas is rolling down the street with two bottles of liquor, each in one hand and a six pack of beer in his backpack. His legs feel kind of sore from riding his skateboard all the way from Taeyong's flat to said Renjun's place. He is relieved when he spots a big house with crisp walls. Lucas doesn't even have to check if it's the right address. Mostly because the bass of the music can be heard all the way down the street and because there are drunk teenagers spilling onto the front yard.

He walks the last few meters up to the door and places his board on the porch hoping that nobody will take it or damage it. He runs his fingers through his hair self-consciously wondering whether Hyuck will like it or not. One more deep breath and he rings the doorbell. It takes about 3 seconds until the door is wrenched open by a disheveled looking Jaemin. His eyes grow wide when he looks at Lucas and he smiles.  
"Well if that isn't Hyuck's lover boy! Almost didn't recognize you!" he screams directly at Lucas face who flinches back a little. Jaemin is obviously drunk enough to not notice how he is talking or rather screaming too loud to be considered normal. He opens the door further and grabs Lucas's jacket to pull him inside. Jaemin turns his head to yell over his shoulder  
"I think Hyuckie is in the kitchen!"

Lucas is getting dragged past dancing teens and can't help but feel a little overwhelmed in the big strange place. He is thankful when Renjun crosses their path and stops Jaemin.  
"Whoa Nana let him breathe." he says.  
He seems pretty sober but Lucas can smell the stench of alcohol on Renjun when he comes closer to grab the bottles from his hands.  
"Come on let's take this to the kitchen." he nods for Lucas to follow. Jaemin already disappeared into thin air. Probably for a drinking game or dancing or something. Lucas sticks close to Renjun as to not get lost.

He almost sighs in relief when they make it to the big kitchen. Renjun places the bottles on the nearest counter and Lucas hands him his backpack with the beer in it. Renjun zips it open and when he sees what's inside he smiles gratefully at Lucas.  
Lucas however can't help but scan the kitchen until he sees a familiar figure with his back turned to him. Hyuck is wearing dark jeans and a Colourful Hawaii shirt that really should look ridiculous but instead looks mesmerizing against Hyuck's body. He hasn't noticed Lucas because he is immersed in a conversation with Jeno. Wild gestures and fast movements underlining the dramatic story he's telling.

Lucas slowly creeps up on him and holds a finger to his lips when Jeno spots him so he doesn't warn Donghyuck. Jeno lips lift up into a subtle smile and he looks back at Hyuck. He lunges forward when he is a few feet away from his boyfriend and all but wrams into him. Donghyuck let's out a surprised shriek as Lucas enguffles him into a big backhug and quickly turns his head.

He scans Lucas's face and then his hair. His eyes widen comically and he turns around to get a better look at Lucas. His jaw falls open.  
"Why look at you!"  
He exclaims and reaches up to run a hand through Lucas's hair resting it against Lucas's cheek. He leans into the touch and smiles at Hyuck.  
"You look fucking hot! I'm lucky!"  
Hyuck grins at him mischievously and pecks Lucas on the lips as a greeting. Lucas hums in pure content.   
"Hello boyfriend." he smiles. And Hyuck smiles back. It feels good to say it. Because Donghyuck is finally his and he can smother him in front of his friends as much as he pleases.

He is easily roped into the conversation between Jeno and Donghyuck after that. Apparently Jeno dips his pizza in honey which is just plain disgusting to Donghyuck. And Lucas, being the good boyfriend he is, backs him up on that.

-

It's about 4 am and the guests have significantly lessened. There are only a few people left on the dance floor and a couple guests are scattered on the near furniture. Lucas is lounging next to Renjun on a black leather sofa. Jeno is sitting across from them in a matching armchair and chats with Renjun about some people in their AP Chem class. Not that Lucas is actually listening. His eyes are firmly trained on Hyuck who's dancing with Jaemin. Donghyuck locks eyes with him ever so often and throws a smile or wink his way.

It's when Jaemin starts getting cozy with a girl that Hyuck rolls his eyes and walks over to them. He grins at Lucas and places himself sideways on his lap. His one hand immediantly finds it's way to the back of Lucas's neck to caress the soft hair there while the other hand grabs Lucas's beer from his hands to take a few sips. He looks like he has always belonged there. Maybe he has?

He hears Donghyuck starting to join the conversation the others are holding but it's more of a murmur in the background to him than anything else. His one arm is around Hyuck's back while the other is resting on his thigh, softly rubbing cricles with his thumb. Donghyuck smells incredibly good. His shirt has moved to reveal his neck and collarbone glistening in a slight sheen of sweat. Lucas tugs Hyuck closer against his body and strains his neck to trail kisses along Hyuck's jaw. Donghyuck doesn't even bat an eyelash and keeps conversing with the others. Lucas frowns. He licks and bites at the side of Donghyuck's neck and smiles when the boy shifts where he's seated and bares his throat even more. He smiles on victory when Hyuck breaths out shakily and starts squirming.  
"Lucas-" he huffs.  
"Don't- Johnny will get all bitchy if you..." he whispers but trails off when Lucas starts sucking a hickey right below Hyuck's jawline. His thumb is still mindelessy caressing Donghyuck's thigh tugging him impossibly closer.

Suddenly Donghyuck's body jerks and he swings his legs around to straddle Lucas. Both his hands are now resting on Hyuck's hips as he looks at him playfully. Mission accomplished.  
Donghyuck frowns but wraps his arms around Lucas's neck.  
"You are an asshole." he states.  
Lucas only grins brighter at that statement and sits up straight from where he was leaning against the sofa to press as close as possible to Donghyuck. Their lips brush when he says  
"Oh C'mon you know you love me."  
Hyuck's lips lift into a small smile as well.  
"Maybe I do." he whispers and leans in for the kiss.

It's different than at Johnny's birthday. They aren't desperate and rushing. It's all slow, languid movements dragging their tongues together. Hands roaming in feather light touches. Lucas hears Jeno fake gagging but Hyuck flips him off and continues as if nothing happened. Lucas is relaxed against the the sofa. Donghyuck's fingers running through his freshly dyed hair send shivers down his spine and make the hairs on his arms stand.

Lucas is so lost in the way everything about Donghyuck feels, smells and tastes that he almost missed Renjun and Jeno standing up and leaving. He only notices because Renjun starts talking to them.  
"The two of you can have the sofa. We're gonna go upstairs to sleep. Everyone else left mostly." he mentions before disappearing with Jeno and a very drunk Jaemin. Lucas looks up and notices that they're alone now. Hyuck let's his head fall to rest on Lucas's shoulder and presses a few soft, tired kisses to his neck. He let's his head fall back when Donghyuck starts biting and sucking a hickey at the very same place.  
"Sleepy?" Lucas asks.  
Hyuck's soft hair brushes against his jaw and neck as he nods.

They settle on the sofa, a thin blanket thrown over them and a few more sleepy kisses exchanged before they drift to sleep, pressed together as close as possible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please tell me what you think?


	6. To Darkness

_"They print my message in the Saturday Sun_  
_I had to tell them I ain't second to none"_

Lucas is stifling his laugh behind his hands. He's sitting at the table in the big white kitchen and has been watching Hyuck singing Michael Jackson songs at the top of his lungs while fixing up breakfast. He marvels at the delicious smell wafting through the room. Donghyuck is wearing a white shirt that he stole out of Renjun's closet after they woke up, swinging his hips to the melody. Lucas thinks it's adorable.

_"And I told about equality and it's true_  
_Either you're wrong or you're right"_

The morning sun shines bright through the huge floor to ceiling windows. The remains of Hyuck's eyeshadow are reflected by the bright light, making him glow. Donghyuck fills the scrambled eggs from the pan into a big bowl and turns around, mimicking a microphone with the wooden spoon and points at Lucas before dramatically bursting out the chorus.

_"But, if you're thinkin' about my baby_  
_It don't matter if you're black or white"_

At this point Lucas can't keep it in anymore. He's hunched over on the chair and clutching his stomach that hurts from laughing so hard. Donghyuck grabs the bowl and sauters over to the table, wriggling his shoulders to the sound of upbeat guitars. He sets down the bowl on the already set table and turns to Lucas.

Donghyuck runs both his hands through Lucas hair to rest on the back of his neck and presses a quick peck to his lips. He grins at Lucas.  
"My baby looks so good with black hair." he gushes and pinches Lucas's cheek. Lucas only crinkles his nose making Hyuck laugh before plopping down on a chair. Donghyuck immediantly starts digging in.

Lucas leans back in his chair and smiles. This whole morning feels awfully domestic. Waking up next to Hyuck, messing around while brushing their teeth, eating breakfast together... He feels full of happiness. Donghyuck looking comfortable, singing and dancing without a care in the world is one of the most fulfilling sights in the world.

"Okay," Donghyuck mufflers with half chewed food in his mouth.  
"What's the most stupid thing you've done?" he asks, pointing his fork at Lucas. He feels slightly thrown off by the unexpected question. Lucas furrows his eyebrows and scratches his chin.  
"I don't really know..." he says. But suddenly his eyes light up and he looks back at Donghyuck who's still waiting patiently for an answer  
"Okay. Promise you won't laugh." he hold out his pinky for Hyuck. His boyfriend looks at him amused but links both their fingers.  
"I promise."

"Okay..." Lucas trails off. This is embarrassing. Extremely embarrassing.  
"I-" he slowly starts. Donghyuck looks at him wide eyed and curious.  
"- have a tattoo." he says.  
Donghyuck blinks at him eyes as big as the moon and completely frozen in all his movements. He even stopped chewing his food.

"You have a tattoo?!" barks out and almost falls off the chair at how hard he's laughing. Lucas pouts.  
"Hey! You promised you wouldn't laugh!" he accuses Donghyuck. But that only makes him laugh harder.  
"I was smashed okay? It was Jaehyun's idea and I was drunk enough to think it was a good one..." he mumbles.  
Donghyuck looks at him amused and grabs his shoulders. He bites his lips as to not laugh and looks in Lucas's eyes.

"Show me." he whispers excitedly.  
Lucas falls back into the chair and hides his face behind his hands with a groan.  
"But it's embarrassing!" he whines.  
He looks past his hands and sees Donghyuck staring at him with big, pleading eyes and a huge grin. Well shit. He can't say no to that.

He groans again.  
"Fine."  
He shuffles in his seat and shrugs off his shirt. Lucas rolls his eyes when Donghyuck gives him a flirty whistle. He throws the shirt aside and twists his body to show Hyuck the side of his upper body.

Stretching along the lenght of his ribs is a big Lion head, tattooed in dark ink and precise lines. It's done pretty well actually, which he's thankful for. At least the guys didn't bring him to some shady backroom tattoo artist but a decent one with talent. So while that's pretty stupid by itself, it's not the embarrassing part. Just below the lion head stands 'King of the stage' in black lettering. That's the embarrassing part.

Donghyuck's expression is hard to read. He leans forward and runs his fingers in fleeting touches along the ink plastered under Lucas's skin. The warm fingers make shivers run down his spine. Donghyuck's gaze flickers up to lock with his and a cheeky grin makes it's way onto his face.  
"That's kinda hot."

Lucas chokes. No kidding he literally splutters and starts caughing violently. What the fuck? That came out of nowhere!

He can hear Hyuck's mocking laugh ringing in the kitchen again. Lucas decides to just grab his shirt and put it on again.  
"Aw I was enjoying the view." is the mischievous comment from Donghyuck. Lucas only rolls his eyes and clears his throat.

"What about you? What's the most stupid thing you've done?" he asks.  
Nice one, he thinks to himself, topic successfully changed. Donghyuck raises an eyebrow and rest his chin on his hand.  
"You mean besides dating you?" he bats his eyes innocently. Lucas scoffs a humorless 'haha' that makes Donghyuck's shit eating grin even broader. He hums in thought.  
"I broke my arm in Canada because I thought that riding a sleigh down the rooftop was a good idea." he shrugs. Lucas gapes at him.  
"Why would you do that?" he asks.  
Donghyuck shrugs again.  
"I don't know. Eric and I just wondered if that would work out." he explains as if that isn't extremely idiotic. Lucas raises both his eyebrows unimpressed.  
"It clearly didn't." he mumbles.

"Don't act like you never get dumb ideas, Wong" Hyuck sasses as he stands up and grabs the bowl and plates to bring them to the sink. Lucas follows suit and takes the cups and cutlery to dump them there as well.

He smiles at Donghyuck still shimmying to the soft melodies that carry through the air and decides to wrap him in his arms just because he can. Donghyuck hums in satisfaction as Lucas hands link in front of his stomach. The both sway slowly, caught up in their own little bubble with foolish expressions gracing their faces.

Donghyuck turns in his hold and smiles up at Lucas. Angelic, he thinks to himself. The morning sun caressing his skin and the heat practically seeping off of him and settling right under Lucas's skin.

He lifts Hyuck up to sit on the counter top and presses a kiss to his nose.  
"Are you going to the summer festival?" Lucas asks.  
Donghyuck grins and tilts his head aside.  
"You guys will be playing, right?" he retorts and Lucas nods.  
"Wouldn't miss it for the world." Donghyuck says while running his fingers along Lucas's neck and shoulders.  
"Not like I could miss it anyways." he scrunched his nose up, "Johnny won't shut up about it."

Right. Johnny. Lucas almost forgets in moments like this that they aren't exactly supposed to be with each other and that Johnny, as kind as he can be, would have both of their heads.

"You guys talking again?" he asks with a frown.  
Donghyuck just shrugs.  
"Kinda I guess. Not a lot but we aren't exactly ignoring each other either." he states and Lucas can only frown. He feels guilty. It's wrong of him to cause a fight between the two brothers.  
"Don't worry." Hyuck smiles. "It'll be fine."

Hyuck's fingers trace along the bruise that still hasn't faded on Lucas's cheekbone. His heart breaks at the smile slowly fading off of Donghyuck face. Lucas sighs and averts his eyes. He knows that he won't pry, even if he desperately wants to know what in the hell happened to Lucas. He ows Donghyuck the truth. He should be open and honest with his boyfriend.  
"My dad sometimes drinks a bit too much."  
Lucas's small voice and lifeless shrug feel pathetic, even to him. When he glances back at Hyuck the boy has a thunderstorm wilding in his eyes. His jaw set stubbornly.

"Fucking asshole." he hisses between clenched teeth. Lucas only shrugs once more.  
"I'd rather it be me than my mom. That's why I still live with them. I can't leave her alone..." he whispers biting down in his lip when he feels his eyes stinging.

Donghyuck pulls him into a tight hug and caresses the back of his head like one would do to a wailing toddler.  
"I'm sorry." Donghyuck mumbles.  
Lucas feels that this is too much. He doesn't like the sadness and pity seeping off of Donghyuck. He should be strong for his boyfriend and not be crying over his dad. So he inhales deeply and pulls back.

"We should do the dishes." he states.  
Hyuck looks hesitant to let the topic go like that but eventually sighes. "You're right. Renjun is a clean freak. He'll kick my ass if I leave a mess in his kitchen."

With a game of rock, paper, scissors (that Lucas looses), it's decided that he'll wash the dishes and Hyuck will dry them. He cringes at the lukewarm soap water making his hands all wrinkly.

When he closes his eyes and listens attentively he can hear Donghyuck humming to the song playing in the background in the god-given voice he has.  
"I'm going stargazing with the guys on Wednesday, there's supposed to be a meteor shower. You wanna join? "  
Lucas raises his eyebrows.  
"Wednesday? Don't you have school on Thursday?" he asks but Hyuck just shrugs.  
"You shouldn't skip." Lucas scolds which only earns him another eye roll.  
"Yeah thanks mom. We won't skip. I just want to see it. We'll go to school the next day." he explains.

Lucas squints his eyes at him for any signs of a lie but shrugs when he finds none.  
"Yeah sure. Where?" he answers.  
Donghyuck smiles brightly and presses his lips to Lucas's cheek.  
"On the rooftop of the building Jaemin lives in. It's downtown."  
"Sounds great." Lucas agrees.

-

"Okay so this is the new song I wrote." Mark is frantically pacing around the garage, handing everyone the papers with notes and lyrics written down on them. Jaehyun frowns at the paper in his hands.

"Dance Dance?" He frowns.  
Mark stops his movements to look at Jaehyun.  
"Exactly. I wrote it over the weekend. I just got.... inspired by this super lit street dancer." he explains with a child like glint in his eyes. Lucas scans the the sheet I front of him and lowly plays the melody on his guitar. He smiles.

"It sounds nice." he directs at Mark who looks even more hyper now despite dark eyebags and chapped lips. This boy is really good at overworking himself.  
"Okay I'll be playing the piano for this one." he scurries over to where he already set up said instrument.  
"Okay wait I'll play part of the chorus." he mumbles while arranging the key and pitch on the keyboard. He clears his throat before playing a catchy tune and singing

_"Roll up your sleeves_  
_Get ready, after you lightly warm up your body baby"_  
_Everyone be ready to party_  
_So you won't regret it"_

Johnny is smiling and nodding his head to the beat, just like Jaehyun who taps his feet on the floor and drums his fingers on his thigh. Lucas himself can't stop moving either bobbing his head along to the masterpiece Mark seems to have created.

_"Dance Dance with me_  
_Everybody 1 2 3_  
_So your hands and feet won't stay still"_

He abruptly ends and wipes his hands nervously. Lucas can't stop smiling. The song has a happy feeling and will most likely become one their best ones. And still, despite all the talent he has, Mark feels uneasy.  
"It's really good." Johnny smiles and Jaehyun and Lucas nod in agreement. The tension in Mark's shoulders seems to be flung out the window now, leaving only a giddy smile on Mark's face.  
"Thank you, guys!" he grins brightly.

"We should start practicing it." Johnny says while standing up happily walking over to pat Mark on the back and assume his position. Lucas already feels sorry for the neighbour's who'll be hearing nothing but 'dance dance' for the rest of the afternoon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll be using song / lyrics that alreafy exist bc I'm tok lazy to write some myself. The song I'm referring to here is dance dance by Day6.
> 
> It's really good so go support them! 💛🌼


	7. Winter Winds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look at me updating and shit...
> 
> I'm sorry it's not that frequent. Please forgive me! 😔💛🙏

_'Dance Dance!_

_With me_

_Everybody 1 2 3'_

The the song booms through the garage and dances along the walls. Lucas smiles. Adrenalin and pure extacy are running through his veins. Fingertips sore and necks sweaty they bounce through the room. Mark's new song really is amazing. It's the type of tune just makes energy light up inside of you. That makes you want to move.

They end the song with big laughs. He might not be able to practice much longer. They've been at it for what? 1 hour? He glances at the clock. No, almost two.

Lucas clears his throat. It feels rough and every word gently scrapes the insides of his mouth. They're all breathing heavily.

"Jeez, I think that's enough for today."  
Johnny mentions and let's himself fall back onto their infamous leather couch, Guitar now resting on his lap.  
"I think if we keep going I'm going to loose my voice."  
Mark agrees.

They all settle. Mark is pressed to Johnny's side. They had to properly put away their instruments to rest comfortably. Jaehyun and Lucas decided to sit on the fluffy carpet in front of them.

They all stay silent for a while, just recharging in each other's presence. Lucas appreciates moments like this. When they all just relax and let all their troubles fade away for the time being.

Next thing he knows 'in my feelings' is ringing through the silence. Lucas cringes. He doesn't hate drake but it really isn't his preferred genre. Especially not if every time Jaehyun get's a call, which is surprisingly often, that annoying song is making his eardrums bleed.

"What's up?" Jaehyun answeres the phone with a casuallity and nonchalance that can only mean his neighbor and frienemy Doyoung calls.

"You did what?"  
He sighs. There is more silence and Lucas thinks he can hear Doyoung's voice through the speaker but it sounds more like gibberish.  
"Like right now?" Jaehyun groans and rubs the bridge of his nose.

There is some more of the static voice that is suspiciously loud, as if Doyoung is yelling on the other end.  
"Yeah-" Jaehyun gets interrupted and rolls his eyes.  
"Okay! Fine! I'll be there in twenty!" he declares and adds under his breath:  
"No reason to insult me."

Doyoung seemingly complains some more until Jaehyun pushes the hang up button way harder than necessary.  
"Okay guys." he speaks while heaving his body up and brushing off the imaginary dirt.

"I've got to go. Doyoung locked himself out." he sighs.  
"so now I have to get the spare key he gave me or" he explains and puts the next part in finger quotes:  
"He'll kill me in my sleep because he's freezing his ass of"

Mark laughs at him, high and obnoxious and so familiar to Lucas. He's heard that laugh like a bazillion times.  
"As if it's my fault he forgot his keys." Jaehyun mutters as he picks up his bag and walks to the door. He waves at them over his shoulder and let's the door falls shut.

"I'm getting us drinks and something to eat."  
Johnny exlcaims while standing up.  
"Thanks mom!" Mark and Lucas tease in unison.

Johnny only dismisses them with a wave of his hand and trotts to the door that connects the garage to the house.

Lucas leans back gainst the sofa and cranes his neck to look up to where Mark is spread out with his eyes closed.  
"Hey Mark." he calls out.  
Mark just humms but doesn't move an inch. Exhaustion clearly caught up on him.

"Hey Mark!" he calls again but louder. Mark only sighs and pries one eye open to look at him.  
"What?" he asks blankly.

Lucas tries his best and sweetest smile.  
"You know you're an amazing musician and gifted songwriter, right?" he tries to charm Mark who seems as unimpressed as he could be.  
"What do you want?" he asks.

Lucas grins and scrambles to grab his guitar. He settles on the floor again with his legs crossed and smiles at Mark who looks mildly confused.  
"Okay-" Lucas grins so bright he almost looks like he's about to suggest a resolution for world hunger.

"I want to write a song and need your help."

It's quiet. Mark looks at him expressionless. He slowly raises an eyebrow at Lucas that arches ridiculously.  
"A song..." judges.  
Lucas doesn't let that phase him and nods enthusiastically.

"Yes! I kind of have a melody already. It's not perfect yet but-" he looks at Mark again.  
"Should I just show you? " he asks.  
Mark just shrugs helplessly because he knows Lucas will play it no matter if he says yes or no.

He grins and shuffles a little before he presumes his position perfect to show Mark the tune he worked on.

Actually he got a sudden surge of inspiration after the party at Renjun's and the fantastic morning after. He can't help but smile every time recalls Hyuck, illuminated by the sun, swaying his hips to the music and the million dollar smile.

He sat down, every evening and even brought his guitar to the garage to work on the melody in his breaks. Taeyong was annoyed at first but started to enjoy sitting with Lucas and listening as he figured out bit by bit how he imagines the song. After it sounded less of a jumbled mess and more like music Taeyong seemed rather pleased.

He knows it unusual for him to actually write songs. He is a good rapper and pretty decent singer and he plays the guitar like a genius but he just never actually- wrote a song. Most of their songs are produced by the little music prodigy Mark, some even by Johnny but not a single one by Lucas. So Mark's surprise is understandable.

But Lucas feels good about it. He wrote most of it just by hearing, listening and figuring out what sounds right to him. The soft and strong notes perfectly fit the hymn he plans to dedicate to love. His love.

Slowly, his red and sore fingertips lift to play the strings of the guitar. He's immersed, almost hypnotised in what he's doing. There's only him, soft notes and blurry memories of soft lips and warm laughs in his little bubble.

It ends to soon, he thinks. Playing a song that he wrote certainly feels different. It feels raw and emotional on a level he can't really begin to comprehend.

He peeks at Mark and what greets him are blown eyes and a gaping mouth.  
"What the fuck!" Mark articulates loudly.  
"That really fucking good Lucas!" he grins and leans forward to hold onto Lucas shoulders.

"You wrote that?" he pries and Lucas rolls his eyes. What great trust Mark has in his capability... Not.  
"Yes. I did." he smiles nonetheless and Mark mirrors his expression.  
"I haven't figured really figured out the lyrics yet." Lucas shrugs.

Mark tilts his head.  
"Well what's the song supposed to be about?" he asks.  
Lucas averts his eyes and shrugs again.  
"Love." he utters.  
When he looks back at Mark his bandmate is frowning.  
"Love?" he parrots with an intense gaze boring into Lucas's.

"Hey! Johnny told me to bring you the drinks."  
A very angelic voice interrupts them and saves Lucas from having to explain himself. His head immediantly whips around and he can barely contain a smile when he spots Donghyuck standing there, waving cold bottles of soda in his hands.

Lucas feels that all so familiar warmth and giddiness creep up on him and grabs his guitar really hard as to not make some stupid move and kiss his boyfriend right there.

Donghyuck throws both of the bottles at them and Lucas barely catches his. He smiles at Mark and then at Lucas. The smile he receives is different however. It's more secretive, sure but it's also more... soft and loving. Hyuck twirls around and sauters back to the door.

Lucas tries but can't stop his eyes from trailing down his back to the way his loose, white shirt moves along his muscles to where it's tucked into colorful stripes of the jeans hugging his hips. He does have a really cute butt-

Nope. He quickly turns to looks at Mark again. He's not supposed to stare at Hyuck like that. Mark is sitting right there. Well he's kind of a dense motherfucker so maybe he wouldn't notice anyway but there's also Johnny. Who lives here. And could have literally caught him right there. He really needs to practice his self control...

"I brought canned ravioli and cinnamon buns" Johnny exclaims when he enters the room just after Hyuck left.  
"Weird mix." Lucas muses.  
Johnny shrugs as if ravioli and cinnamon buns aren't the weirdest match ever.  
" 's all we have left. I haven't managed to go shopping yet."

Mark immediantly claims a can of ravioli and a spoon and shovels it into his mouth. Johnny and Lucas both cringe. Ew.

-

By the time Lucas rolls along the streets on his way to the adress that Hyuck gave him its already dark. The normally busy streets are mostly empty and only illuminated by yellow lampposts.

He comes to halt in front of a tall building and spots Hyuck sitting on the sidewalk with a stretched out finger, trailing shapes on the turf. Cute. He thinks.

Donghyuck looks up with big doe eyes when he hears Lucas's skateboard stopping. His face morphs into a smile and he jumps up to pull Lucas down. Lucas sighs into the kiss. Kissing Hyuck always makes him feel fuzzy and happy, as if someone stuffed cotton into his head. It's the best feeling ever really.

He doesn't even have time to recover before Hyuck pulls him to the fire escape and throws a challenging smiles Lucas's way. They both laugh hysterically at a sudden race up the stairs. They're old and the loud creaks should be concerning but he's too caught up in the moment. It the burning in his lungs and Hyuck's laughter ringing melodically. And mayhaps Lucas purposely let's Hyuck win.

Donghyuck beams at him when he reaches the last platform first.  
"I won!" he declares.  
Lucas doesn't really stop his movements and uses that speed to press Hyuck against the facade of the building. Hyuck's back hits the wall with a barely audible 'oof'. He grins down and places a soft peck on his nose.  
"Sure did."

"Hey suckers!" someone yells from above them and Lucas squints at Renjun leaning over the rooftop's edge just a few meters above them. He points at the ladder that's supposed to lead from the fire escape to the rooftop.

Lucas laughs and presses a final kiss to Hyuck's lips. He pushes his boyfriend forward to climb up the ladder before him. Because he's a gentleman. Maybe also because the view is nice from where he stands as Donghyuck waddles up.

"Stop staring at my butt!" he yells over his shoulder, making Lucas's gaze snap up. Donghyuck reached the top and is now smiling down at him in mischief.  
"Don't think I didn't notice at the garage." he laughs and Lucas does too.

The rooftop is really nice. It's clean and spacious and there are blankets and pillows spread out with Jaemin and Jeno already lounging on them. Renjun joins them.

Donghyuck doesn't leave time for Lucas to hesitate and pulls him to lay down together. Lucas marvels at how small Hyuck seems if he curls up against his side like this. It's warm and homey.

Faint tunes ring from a music speaker that's lying next to them. Lucas closes his eyes and curls the arm that's laying under Hyuck's head to pull him closer. He delicately traces his fingers along Donghyuck's neck and smiles at the appreciative hum and the soft skin burning under his touch.

When he opens his eyes he's greeted with an enthralling sight. The dark sky is stretching above them for miles and miles. The stars shine brighter than ever and Lucas muses if they were always this bright. There are stripes of silver cutting along the back abyss. Dozens of shooting stars.

At that moment he feels incredibly small. He realizes how huge the universe is and how little he's seen of it. He's just a small, tiny part of something so much bigger. It feels sobering. Like his mind has never been clearer.

He turns his head to look at Donghyuck. There is a soft smile playing on his lips and his eyes are shining bright. Lucas is convinced that the millions of stars are reflecting in Hyuck's eyes. He whomst is shining brighter than all of them.

"Make a wish." Lucas whispers.  
The moment feels fragile. Like it could break and slip through his fingers at any given moment.  
Donghyuck turns to look at him too.

His smile seems even more blinding now. Lucas can see silver specs reflecting in Hyuck's big, dark eyes that crinkle up in happiness.

"I love you."

Lucas eyes widen. Those three, hushed words make a blazing fire ignite in his chest. They settle in his heart and wrap around his exhausted mind.

He turns so he's laying above Hyuck, his elbows resting on the soft blankets and careful fingers brushing soft hair out of Donghyuck's smile. He doesn't feel jittery or nervous. He feels incredibly calm, leaning down slowly and pouring all his emotions, every single thought into a kiss.

"I love you too."

He mutters as he pulls away. Donghyuck smile could probably cure all the pain in the word. It's made of pure glee and satisfaction.

-

"MARK!" he bursts into Mark's home the very next morning.  
"MARK! WHERE ARE YOU!" he yells. He knows for sure that Mark's mother has treatment this week and won't be home otherwise he would've been more considerate... maybe.

"What the hell, Lucas."  
Mark stumbles down the stairs blindly, not having opened his eyes properly.

Lucas storms forward and holds Mark in place by his shoulder slightly shaking him which just earns him and sleepy frown. Lucas waves a few sheets with messy scribbles on them infront of his face.

"I figured out the lyrics!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They said the l-word
> 
> My babies....


	8. Little Lion Man

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who's back and better than ever🤪🤟🏻
> 
> I'm sorry for not updating in so long but I had the worst writers block and school's been kicking my booty. I basically have the end written out I just need to get there. 
> 
> I hope yall haven't abandoned this story yet! 💛💛💛

"Lucas." Mark deadpans.  
"Are you for real?"  
Mark runs a hand through his messy bed head and let's it fall limply to his side. He sighs and looks at Lucas.

"Yeah!" Lucas smiles.  
"I was writing this" he waves around the sheets in his hands "the whole night."  
Mark sighs once more but reaches forward to grab the crinkled sheets and yank them out of Lucas's hands. He frowns at the messy pencil letters and suddenly turns to grab pair of reading glasses off the nearby shelf. They almost slide down from where he perches them on his nose.

"Jesus you couldn't have written this down more.... readable? This looks like chicken scratch." Mark squints his eyes.  
Lucas just rolls his eyes in return.  
"Come on don't be so grumpy. It's not that bad."

Mark looks him dead in the eyes with raised eyebrows as if to ask 'Really?'. Lucas just tries his best grin.

"And this couldn't have waited till I don't know- way later?" he asks Lucas.  
"Mark!" Lucas leans forward and holds Mark's hands that are still clasped around the lyrics.  
"We need to finish this asap!" he urges.  
"We have to play it at the festival."

Mark's eyes widen significantly.  
"You're fucking with me, right? That's in less than two weeks!" Mark exclaims and immediately starts shaking his head at Lucas's pout.  
"Are you insane there's not enough time to finish and practice it!"  
"Markie~ please!" he whines.  
Mark stubbornly crosses his arms. 

"No! There's no way I'll help you write the song!"

-  
-  
-

"I can't believe I'm helping you..." Mark groans.

They're cooped up in the makeshift studio that's cramped into Mark's bedroom. Lucas grins at him. It was way too easy to convince Mark to help him with this. A whine here, a pout there and Mark is a goner. Always too kind for his own good. 

Mark switched his pajamas for a comfortable sweater and is hunched next to Lucas at the desk. Lucas has a guitar resting on his thighs. For the last two hours Mark had him play the melody of the song over and over again so he could write everything down properly. It's tiring, sure. But he's pulsing with excitement at the same time. 

They're trying to match the words Lucas wrote down to the beat and tempo.  
"Okay the distribution of syllables doesn't work here. We'll have to leave out this word." Mark mumbles while furiously erasing and rewriting things on the music sheet.

"I think we should devide it into a vocal and rap part. That'd sound cool. You could rap and I'd sing." he remarks, eyes never leaving the sheet in front of him.  
Lucas smiles.  
"Sounds like an amazing idea." 

"Lucas?" Mark asks absent-minded, still scribbling. Lucas hums to show he's listening.  
"Why is this song so urgent anyways?" he mumbles.

Lucas whips his head to look at Mark. He can't help but shrug helplessly, not finding the proper words right away.  
"There's a person." he starts with a small smile gracing his lips.  
"A person that helped me a lot and makes me really happy."

Mark's whole body freezes for a moment. He slowly rests the pencil next to the sheet and turns to lock his wide eyes with Lucas's.  
"I guess I just want to give something back." he shrugs again.  
"A gift if you will."

Mark tilts his head and scans Lucas whole posture. His gaze drifts to the music sheets and messy writing and he smiles softly, turning back to face Lucas.

"Well, looking at the lyrics they must be wonderful." Mark grins at him.  
Lucas nods in agreement.  
"They are."

Mark turns back and picks up the pencil again. Just as he's about to set it down and start writing again he looks at Lucas again.  
"I hope you'll introduce us someday." he says.

Lucas can only smile sadly. He wants to. He really wants to.  
"I hope so too..."

-

"Okay why on earth do we have an 'emergency practice' right now?" Jaehyun complains.  
That's all he's been doing ever since he arrived at the garage. 

Lucas sent a message to all member's to meet urgently for practice. And apparently Jaehyun was in the middle of playing games and now he's pissed off because it's his 'first free day in weeks'. Not that Lucas actually cares.

Mark clears his throat next to him and hands Johnny and Jaehyun the music sheets they had prepared. The two others frown at the sheets and then send a questioning look their way.  
"What's this?" Johnny asks carefully.

"A new song." Mark states.  
"Lucas wrote it. With a little help but mostly just him."  
Lucas feels pride bloom in his chest at the shocked and surprised glances that Johnny and Jaehyun send his way.

"And this is urgent because...?" Jaehyun asks.  
"Because we'll be playing it at the festival." Lucas states proudly. Johnny and Jaehyun gape at him before laughing awkwardly.  
"You're joking right?" Johnny tries carefully. Mark and Lucas however shake their heads. It's quiet for a few beats. 

"We don't have enough time to learn a new song!" Johnny exclaims.  
"It's really good!" Mark buts in. Jaehyun only groans.  
"That doesn't change the fact that we can't learn a new song now! It's not enough time!"

Lucas steps forward. He claspes his hands together tightly and falls to his knees.  
"Please!" he begs them.  
"The song is really important to me!" he looks deep into Johnny's eyes and can feel the older caving. He sees it in the way he starts squirming and fidgeting slightly. He looks anywhere but at Lucas.  
"Please..." he pleads again.

Johnny sighs and rubs his eyes.  
"Fine.... Get up you drama queen." he grumbles.  
Jaehyun whips around and gapes at them.  
"What? No! No way!"

Lucas however beams at both of them and wraps them in a tight, warm hug. Jaehyun hisses something that suspiciously sounds like "fucking weakling" at Johnny but Lucas chooses to ignore him.  
"Thank you." he utters under his breath.

Mark claps his hand together to get their attention.  
"Okay we should start practicing right away!"  
Jaehyun groans even louder.  
"Really? You don't care about my protest at all?" he whines but remains ignored by his band mates.  
"Are you guys for real?" he asks. Silence is the only thing that follows.  
".... Fine" he groans and shuffles over to the drums.  
"I hate all of you..."

-

His steps echoe through the eerily quiet streets. Lucas is used to the dark night swallowing up all noise. His eyes burn and his back aches. He's barely standing up straight at this point. 

They've been practicing a whole lot the past few days. They perfected every note, every word and every chord to every song they'll be playing at the festival. Which feels good because he feels super prepared but also sucks because he's so tired. 

Additionally he works extra shifts because Sicheng who also works for Taeyong got severely sick and Lucas offered to take his shifts because the shop is extremely busy lately and he can't leave Taeyong alone with all the work. To say he's exhausted is an understatement. 

Hyuck texted him a couple of times this week and asked to do something together. Lucas felt his heart clenching every time he had to tell him he's too busy despite Hyuck telling him that it's fine, that he understands. He can't even indulge in long calls or text conversations as there's no time at all. He feels like crying sometimes because he knows that Donghyuck doesn't deserve this. The only thing that's keeping him from dropping everything and running to him is the fact that the song is for Hyuck. He hopes he'll understand. 

As soon as the front door is in sight his stomach growls loudly. He hasn't been eating much lately as there's simply not been enough time. 

A glance at the empty parking space in front of their house relaxes him further. He fishes for his key and smacks the door shut as soon as he's inside. He let's his back rest against it and closes his eyes. The cold door and quiet house soothe his headache slightly. Lucas sighs into the quiet and begins peeling off his shoes. 

Just as expected they barely have anything in the refrigerator but enough to make a basic pasta dish. That'll have to do, he's too tired to be picky right now. 

"Xuxi?" his mother's wavery voice questions just as the water starts to boil. He looks over his shoulder to smile at her.  
"Hey mom." he greets her.  
"I'm making pasta. Do you fancy some?" 

She smiles softly and nods before making her way to the table. Lucas notices her fidgeting with the hem of her worn sweater, which is weird. Well it's not that uncommon actually. It's a nervous habit she developed when his dad started drinking. The weird part is that she is fidgeting now, when his dad isn't even in the house. 

He concentrates on preparing the noodles and sauce but hears her shuffling behind his back. It's making him antsy. There has to be something really important for her to be nervous around Lucas. 

He won't ask though. Lucas know that whatever it is, his mom will tell him when she's ready. So he'll just wait for now. He almost jumps when his mom clears her throat. 

"Um" she starts her voice wavering.  
"Lizzy called. She has the night shift today. Your dad passed out at the bar and she said she'll wake him up when they close." 

Lucas nods. He likes the nights where his dad passes out. It means they'll have a calm night and can leave before he comes back around 6 am most of the time.  
"I'll leave early tomorrow then." he sighs.  
"You should too."  
He doesn't expect an answer so he's not surprised about the silence that follows. 

Lucas smiles down at the two plates of pasta he arranged. He liked cooking together with his mom when he was little. They don't really do it anymore. For obvious reasons. 

One plate is placed in front of his mother and he plops down next to her with the other. The kind smile that graces her lips makes Lucas feel warm and at ease. It feels like home. His mother reaches out and tenderly cups his cheek, her bony fingers warm against his skin. 

"Thank you Xuxi." he smiles nervously.  
Lucas smiles back and puts his hand on top of hers, holding it on place.  
"Mom, are you okay?" he asks carefully. 

Her smile wavers and she sighs.  
"I need to talk to you about something." she averts her eyes and gulps. Lucas turns his head and kisses her palm reassuringly.  
"Okay." he whispers.  
Her eyes flicker around in the room until she closes them and sighs again. 

"I think I'll move out." 

It's a hushed statement that seems too far fetched to Lucas. He never thought he'd ever hear her say these words. He had given up hope. 

A broad grin stretches across his face and he brings her hands together.  
"That's so great mom." he grins.  
She nods.  
"My friend, Emily, I don't know if you remember her... She convinced me. I know he's hurting you and I love you too much to let that happen any longer." the words come rushing out of her fast and jumbled. 

Lucas carefully caresses her hands to calm her.  
"I'm proud of you." he smiles.  
"Will you stay with her?" he asks.  
She nods but frowns. 

"I'll have to leave the city..." she whispers.  
"Emily lives miles down south in a small house on a farm." she mumbles.  
Lucas nods enthusiastically.  
"That's great. The farther away from him you are the better I'll feel." 

Her frown deepens further and she finally looks Lucas in the eye.  
"Will you be okay? You could always come with me." she looks at him with big eyes. Lucas shakes his head. 

"I can't. I have a job, my friends, the band and ...."  
Hyuck, he adds in his head.  
His mom grins a little and raises an eyebrow at him.  
"And what?" she asks. 

Lucas feels calm as ever. The long lost sparkle is back in her eyes, her smile missing the strain it adapted over the years. She seems happier.  
"... and a boyfriend." he says. 

Her eyes grow big and shine in excitement. She grabs Lucas cheeks and pinches them, hard.  
"A boyfriend? Why didn't you tell me! What's his name?" she asks leaning forward in curiosity.  
"His name is Donghyuck. Do you want to see a picture of him?" he asks already fishing his phone out of his pocket. 

He presses the powerbotton and is faced with a picture of both Hyuck and him. Donghyuck is sitting cross-legged on the rooftop, munching on strawberries with Lucas behind him, wrapping him in his arms and pressing their cheeks together. Jeno took it and sent it to Hyuck who sent it to Lucas. It's his favorite picture by far. 

He hold his phone out to his mom who snatches it quickly and examines the picture closely. A brilliant grin lights up her face even more.  
"Ah how cute!" she coos.  
"Introduce him to me soon, will you!" she orders immediantly. Lucas smiles and confirms. 

"I can't leave everything behind. I'll be fine. I saved money for a flat. I'm happy you made this decision. You already look better." he kisses her cheek.  
When he sees her eyes watering he immediantly looks anywhere else. He can't see his mom cry or he'll start too.  
"Eat your pasta. It'll get cold." he decides on changing the topic. 

 

-

Lucas feels slightly nauseous. 

It's 5 pm and he's been awake for 12 hours, working 10 of them, after staying awake and practicing with the band until 1 am. 

Whenever he could he helped his mom pack up her things discreetly. Emily came over once this week and picked up some things already. They're only waiting for the perfect moment, where his dad isn't home, to move all her stuff and finally get her out of there. 

He's even been looking at a flat that's out for renting nearby. It's not big and certainly not luxurious but it could be his own. He's been saving up after all. 

"Hey are you okay?" Taeyong's voice makes him jump and turn, facing his boss's worried expression.  
"You look pale..." Taeyong frowns.  
"You can go home you know. I know you've been working your ass off lately because of Sicheng. Take a break." he tries. 

Lucas furiously shakes his head.  
"No, no. I'm fine. I'm not leaving you alone here." he tries to muster a genuine smile. Taeyong looks unconvinced.  
"Lucas-"  
"I'm fine." he interrupts. "trust me. It's just 1 hour till we close." 

Lucas turns around again and frowns at the paperwork in front of him. His eyes are burning and the words and numbers in front of him blur. The tiredness is creeping up on him. He feels like banging his head on the desk. 

"Lucas?" a soft voice interrupts him while he's trying hard to focus on the papers in front of him. He holds back from groaning and looks up. He can't stop the surprise from slipping onto his face. What is she doing here?

"….Chae?" he slowly says. The girl nods enthusiastically, her curly hair bouncing around her shoulders. Lucas used to think she was extremely pretty and sexy but now, compared to Donghyuck she seems... boring. 

"You didn't contact me in so long and I was in the neighborhood so I thought I'd just drop by." she smiles.  
"I'm sorry Chae. But I did say It's a one time thing right? It was like months ago..." he tries carefully. 

She just shrugs.  
"So what? You can't tell me you don't want it too." she leans forward on the counter. Lucas takes a step back.  
"I don't." he states.  
She raises her perfectly crafted brow.  
"Come on Lucas. Don't be such a spoilsport." 

He almost groans in annoyance.  
"Im dating someone." he crosses his arms but she just shrugs again.  
"I don't care." she slips around the corner and stands right infront of him. Her manicured fingers trail up and down his arm to his shoulders and neck. 

"Baby come on." she whispers in his ear.  
Lucas pushes her back carefully and slaps her hand away.  
"Not. Interested." he scowls.  
"If you don't have a car to fix you may leave now." he points towards the exit. 

She scoffs offended and puts her hands on her hips.  
"Wow you've become so boring. What happened?" she rolls her eyes.  
Lucas shrugs and stares at her blankly.  
"I fell in love." he says.  
She rolls her eyes again. 

"Oh please as if you even know what love is."  
She laughs humorless.  
It's Lucas turn to scoff.  
"And you do? We agreed it was a one time thing. It's in the past. Get over your huge ego. I don't want you. Sorry." 

She glares at him and stomps off, flipping him off over her shoulder.  
"You're and idiot Lucas. You don't know what you're missing." she yells without turning around. Lucas chooses not to answer, already bored with her antics. 

He falls back onto the chair behind the counter and groans loudly. Lucas leans back with his eyes closed and only opens them when Taeyong awkwardly clears his throat. 

"Um...." he trails off.  
"Hyuck brought this for you." he holds up a lunchbox and puts it down in front of Lucas. His mood momentarily brightens, not for long though. 

"Where is he now?" he asks.  
Taeyong shrugs helplessly.  
"I don't know why but he was kind of pissed. He said he wanted to visit you but you are 'busy otherwise apparently'." he puts the last part in quotation marks. 

Lucas frowns. Busy with wha- oh no. He came in the worst moment. He jumps up from his chair and slams his hands on the counter, making Taeyong flinch. 

"Can I still take that break?" he urges.  
Taeyong nods dumbly and mumbles a confused 'Sure'. Before he even finished the sentence Lucas already grabbed his things and surged out the door.

He's rushing down the streets on his board. The vibrations of the old streets are kind of uncomfortable but he barely feels it at the moment. His thoughts are rather occupied.

He arrives in front of the Seo house with almost having fallen four times and almost being run over twice. He pants slightly but feels better when Johnny's car isn't in the driveway. Only Hyuck's bicycle is lying abandoned on the lawn. 

Lucas rushes to the front door and knocks violently. Yeri yanks it open with a scowl.  
"Are you trying to break the goddamn door?" she exclaims. Lucas ignores what she says.  
"I need to talk to Hyuck." he says. 

Yeri sighs and presses her lips into a thin line. She nods her head in direction of the stairs and steps aside for Lucas to enter. He smiles at her.  
"Thank you!" is all he rushes out before bolting up the stairs. 

He halts in front of the door and opens it carefully. Hyuck is curled up into a small ball ontop of his bed, his back hunched and knees pulled to his chest. It almost breaks his heart.  
"Go away Yeri. I wanna be alone." Hyuck sighs, voice watery. 

Lucas bites his lips and takes one deep breath before speaking up.  
"I'm not Yeri." he states.  
Donghyuck shoots up to sit and whips his head around to look at Lucas with big, glossy eyes. Lucas frowns at the wet trails of tears down his cheeks.

Hyuck aggressively rubs his eyes with his sleeve and mumbles into the fabric:  
" What're you doing here..."  
Lucas steps into the room and softly closes the door behind himself. He carefully walks over to the bed and sits across from Hyuck.

"Taeyong said you seemed upset." he shrugs.  
Hyuck chokes out a watery laugh that sounds more like a pathetic sob.  
"So you dropped everything to rush over."  
"We close in a few anyways."  
Lucas shrugs again and it's quiet for a bit.

"Can I hug you?" he asks carefully.  
Hyuck nods and shuffles closer.  
"Please do." he mumbles.  
Lucas smiles softly and pulls Donghyuck into his lap. He wraps him in his arms around him and rests his cheek on top of the unruly mop of hair. He decides on stroking Hyuck's back when he feels fresh tears, wet on his neck.

"I'm sorry baby. I didn't mean to make you upset. But there's nothing going on with Chae. It's all long in the past. I love you." he mumbles.  
A shuddering breath leaves Hyuck's lips.  
"I know" he mumbles.  
"I know you'd never cheat on me. I saw you push her away I just got a little- insecure I think. Sorry for overreacting."

Lucas kisses his temple and hums softly.  
"You're not overreacting. If you're upset then you're upset. We just have to talk about it, okay?"  
Hyuck pulls back and smiles carefully.  
"Okay. You're right."

Donghyuck smiles uncharacteristically shyly and holds out his pinky finger.  
"Promise we'll always talk about it if one of us is upset." he looks into Lucas's eyes.  
Lucas links their pinkies and presses a kiss to Hyuck cheek.  
"Promise."

They're quiet for a moment until Lucas grins slyly and speaks up.  
"So Johnny has a late shift today. You wanna play Mario Cart?" Lucas asks  
Hyuck grins at him mischievously and presses a quick peck to his lips.  
"Aw babe you know me too well."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My kink? Relationships with a healthy communication.


	9. Sigh No More

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof! Look at me updating again!!!  
> Whats going oooon😂

"Ugh, I can't feel my arms."  
Jaehyun whines as he leans against the two trunk doors of their van.

They bought it for cheap money about two years ago. They all spent a month repairing the white van. Johnny called Ten in to paint the blank sides. Lucas remembers being in awe at the easy lines, sprayed on fluently and sharpened with templates in vibrant oranges and yellow.

It's been their band-car ever since, used to drive to all the gigs and concerts since all instruments fit in the trunk and they can still sit comfortably.

Lucas rounds the car and let's his fingers trail along its side where the wild mane is painted on. There are splatters of mud, especially on the lower half of the car that none of them seem to bother cleaning.

Jaehyun already hopped into the drivers seat, seemingly too exhausted and lazy to help load the speakers remaining on the sidewalk. Lucas is just bending down to grab another one to stack into the trunk when his eyes flicker to the front door of Johnny's house.

He locks eyes with a grinning Hyuck leaning against the doorframe. Hyuck pushes himself of the door and nods for Lucas to follow inside. He can't help but smile back. He glances over his shoulder and sees Mark and Johnny carrying a speaker together, bickering and completely immersed in the task.

"Uhm guys-" he clears his throat and straightens his back.  
"I think I forgot my phone inside. I'll just go, grab it real quick."  
Lucas steps backwards carefully. As soon as Johnny and Mark grumble in something akeen to agreement he turns around and scurries to the door.

The hallway is empty but when he passes the kitchen, he can see Donghyuck perched on the counter top. He's wearing comfortable sweatpants and a big sweatshirt, looking all fluffy and cuddly.

Lucas strides over in a few quick step and grabs Hyuck's face, pressing their lips together in a long kiss.

Donghyuck giggles as he pulls away.  
"Well someone's excited." he smiles and pulls Lucas closer, hands gripping onto his sides.  
Lucas nods happily. Anxiety is pulsing through his body. He kind of feels like throwing up.  
"I am. And a little nervous."

Donghyuck hugs him even closer around his torso and crains his neck to kiss his forehead. It's tender and warm and makes Lucas's shoulders relax a little.  
"You'll do amazing. I know it." he smiles.  
"And I'll be there too. Watching you, enjoying the show. You'll do good."

Lucas hums softly, his fingers absent-mindedly rubbing circles on Hyuck's neck.  
"I'll be fine if you're there." he whispers, smiling as Hyuck's cheeks tint pink. It's still shocking when the usually to confident Donghyuck blushes.  
"You're not going alone are you?" he asks.

The festival is big and will be crowded. Lucas doesn't really want Hyuck to walk around there alone. Not that he isn't old enough and capable of going alone. He trusts Donghyuck. He just doesn't really trust hundreds of probably high or drunk people.

Donghyuck shakes his head.  
"No. Jaemin will come with Jeno and Renjun later to pick me up. So it'll be the four of us."  
Pleased, he presses another kiss to Hyuck's cheek.

Donghyuck swallows and fidgets subtly. He looks like he's about to say something when Johnny yelling Lucas's name from outside interrupts them. He presses another tender kiss to Hyuck's velvet lips and moves to the door quickly.

"I have to go! I'll see you later." he says, walking backwards.  
Donghyuck blows him a kiss and laughs.  
"You go Babe!"

Lucas actually feels better when he steps onto the sunny sidewalk again. He still feels jittery but the nervousity isn't swirling uncomfortably in his stomach anymore. He'll be fine, knowing that Hyuck is rooting for him.

"Lucas I found your phone. It was laying on one of the speakers." Mark frowns dangling the device between his fingers. Right! That's why he supposedly went into the house.  
"Oh uh yeah thanks Mark. I was wondering why I didn't find it." he laughs nervously.  
Mark looks at him weirdly but hands him the phone nonetheless.

"You finally ready to go?" Jaehyun groans leaning out the car window. Mark scoffs.  
"We could've been faster if you had helped." he complains but marches to hop into the car anyways.

-

The bass notes are ringing through his bones along with hysterical cheers.

Lucas is wringing his hands nervously. They're waiting backstage on a black leather sofa. The rehearsal and sound check were long done and since the festival started, already three bands and two singers have performed.

They won't be performing in the next hour. Currently a rap trio is performing, hopping across the stage from what he can see. Then there will be two more bands before them but Lucas can't help but feel nauseous already.

Yeri bursted in about forty minutes ago with a huge make up case and a devilish smirk in place. She's already done with Johnny's and Mark's face and is currently dabbing foundation on Jaehyun's face, nodding to the rhythm of the song playing.

It's not like they asked her to do their makeup. In fact, they didn't want to have their makeup done at all but Yeri insisted that they have to look like stars if they're going to perform on a stage this big. And while doing that, she also planned their outfits and styled their hair.

All of them were forced to wear one of the shirts or sweaters printed with their logo and ripped skinny jeans because Yeri claims that those are hot. Lucas doesn't think that pants that are cutting off his leg circulation are hot in any way.

She seems rather pleased with what she is doing, Lucas muses. And the guys looks amazing. Their hair flops effortlessly on their foreheads and their eyes are dark and defined. At least she's good at what she's doing. He couldn't imagine what would've happened if one of the guys tried to style them.

He's wrenched from his thought process at a loud 'thank you everybody!' being yelled into the mic on stage. The cheers that follow are deafening. Three guys, their sweaty skin reflecting red stage lights and their dark clothes drenched, come backstage, waving at the crowd.

The big, happy smiles on their faces are contagious. They make him feel slightly better. He can see the pure joy of performing on their faces and can't help but anticipate their own performance.

He locks eyes with one of them and smiles, holding both thumbs up in acknowledgement. The guy grins and bows as a thank you. That's probably one of the parts of performing with other artists that Lucas likes the most. He learns so much about new genres and new groups and its just so- exciting.

"Yah earth to Lucas" Yeri waves her hand in front of his face.  
"It's your turn." she deadpans.  
Lucas tilts his head in confusion. When Yeri waves around her makeup articles, his eyes grow big.  
"Oh! Right! Go on." he smiles.

Yeri rolls her eyes and squeezes foundation on the back of her hand. A tiny pink sponge is dipped onto the thick liquid and Lucas cringes at the feeling of it working foundation onto his skin.

"Close your eyes." she says after a few minutes while swirling a brush in a palette. Her eyes flicker to glance at the other guys before starting to apply the eyeshadow. The soft strokes on his eyelids feel kind of hypnotic.  
"Hyuckie told me to use gold for you." she whispers happily.  
Lucas's eyes fly open and Yeri gasps.

"Don't! I'll poke you in the eye! Close them!" she exclaims.  
Lucas pouts but closes them as told.  
"Why Gold?" He asks curiously.  
Yeri hums on contemplation.  
"He said it'll make you look- and I'm quoting him here- like a Greek God." he sighs.

Lucas can't stop the smug grin making its way onto his face. He knows he's not ugly but being assured of his looks by his precious, beautiful boyfriend makes him puff his chest.

"Ow!" he whines when Yeri suddenly flicks his forehead.  
"Don't look so smug now." she scolds and starts rummaging through her small handbag. When she seemingly found what she was looking for, Yeri stretches a closed fist out to Lucas.

"Open you palm." she orders.  
Lucas raises his eyebrow and looks at her suspiciously. He hesitantly stretches out his hand. Yeri smirks and drops a bracelet into his palm. Lucas frowns at it. It's made of braided, black leather and has a golden sun charm attached to it.

He directs his confused gaze at Yeri whose smirk turned into a soft smile.  
"What is this?" he asks carefully.  
Yeri sighs and starts packing her things up. She makes sure the others aren't listening again before she starts explaining.  
"It's from Hyuck."

His heart skips a beat.  
"He wanted to give it to you earlier but chickened out. So he asked me to hand it to you." she stands up. Lucas stares at her, his eyes blown wide.  
"But why?...." he trails of.

Yeri grins again.  
"He told me to say it's so you don't faint from stage fright but he actually made it so you know he'll be there for you. As emotional support I guess? The sun is supposed to be a reminder of him." she shrugs as if it's nothing.  
"He loves you a lot you know. It's really cute and also kinda getting on my nerves." she groans.

Lucas gapes at her.  
"What the fuck? That's so adorable." he breathes out.  
Yeri laughs at him and grabs the bracelet from his hands.  
"Here let me help you put it on." she kneels down once more. Lucas stretches his arm out and Yeri ties the leather band around it.  
"Thank you." he mumbles.

He stares in awe down at his wrist, the little golden sun dangling from it. His heart feels as if it's about to burst in his chest. He looks up when Yeri ruffles his hair.

"Okay, dude you look like your eyes are gonna fall out." she laughs.  
"I'll tell him you like it." Yeri winks and turns to saunter away from the backstage area  
"Bye! Don't suck too much!" she waves and yells at them over her shoulder.

-

_'Dance Dance! With me!'_

their new song booms through the speakers. The whole mass of people is jumping dancing laughing at the Upbeat rhythm.

Blue and pink lights are reflecting on their instruments and skin. The crowd is made of little colorful spots lighting up the dark of the night.

They're all sweating buckets at this point. Their hair is matted to their foreheads and their shirts are sticking to their abdomens. It's uncomfortable, sure. But they're all to distracted by the raw energy pulsing on the stage.

_'I feel good baby I feel great_  
_Who cares if you mess up?_  
_I feel good baby I feel great_  
_Don't stop_  
_Don't stop_  
_Don't stop'_

They end the song loud and proud with all of them panting loudly. Lucas spots Hyuck, Yeri and their friends whooping and applauding for them.

He makes eye contact with Hyuck. The enormous, glowing smile on his face makes Lucas chuckle. He steps forward, grabs ahold of the mic with one hand and runs the other through his sweaty bangs.

"Hello guys!" his breathy voice resounds from the the stage, making the crowd scream in retaliation.  
"We have one more song for you!" he grins as more excited screams fill his ears.  
"It's another new song actually. And it's really special to me."

The crowd quietens down and listens attentively. He smiles at Donghyuck who looks at them in confusion.  
"This song is dedicated to someone really special to me. They make me very happy and helped me a lot in ways this person probably doesn't even know."  
He doesn't break eye contact.

"My sunshine, this one is for you. This is rooftop!"  
The masses go wild and he laughs.  
He nods at Jaehyun over his shoulder who immediantly starts playing the song's beat on the drums. Slowly Johnny's guitar joins in.

One last breath, one last smile and Lucas grabs the mic in both hands, softly singing.

_'You pulled me to see the stars._  
_You put the moonlight in my eyes at once._  
_Every time I look up in the sky,_  
_there's no star._  
_I won't leave you alone._  
_Don't let that moon lonely.'_

Lucas and Mark both grab their guitar and bass, playing out the melody and letting their voices harmonize.

_'You pull my hand to see the stars._  
_We sit on the rooftop in the sunset glow._  
_Every time I look up in the sky,_  
_there's no star._  
_It's OK, you are my universe. Shine brightly for me.'_

He let's go of his guitar again and grabs the mic, rap lyrics deeply bleeding from his heart, just for Hyuck. His sun, his love.

_'If these lyrics can comfort you,_  
_I'll hold the pen._  
_I would say from the bottom of my heart_  
_rather than be provocative._  
_All day_  
_you were waiting for me_  
_more like a dog than a cat._  
_What made you so sad all day?_  
_You are the most special on this planet._  
_You didn't know that.'_

He remembers Donghyuck's eyes shining brighter than the stars in the sky. Even now he's glowing brighter that any celestial object ever could.

Mark steps to his own microphone and let's his soft voice carry through the air. Lucas can't help but smile.

_'You want some more._  
_Why do you keep locking yourself up?_  
_You want some more._  
_Sky is nothing to believe.'_

They're swaying, hopping in excitement, bursting out the lyrics on top of his lungs, bleeding Lucas's emotions out for everyone to hear. For Donghyuck to hear.

_'You pull my hand to see the stars._  
_We sit on the rooftop in sunset glow._  
_Every time I look up in the sky,_  
_there's no star._  
_It's OK, you are my universe. Shine brightly for me.'_

Lucas remembers teary and insecure eyes, he remembers happy smiles and confident dancing and can't help but love all of it. Every single aspect.

_'You know_  
_I flinch whenever you make things heavy._  
_I don't have any hand to comfort you._  
_Now I'm a lost star._  
_You are the power to pull me._  
_You are wandering like a sky without stars._  
_Just like the constellation we've been through_  
_you and I follow the road._  
_Remember me.'_

When he looks at Donghyuck again, he isn't hopping and dancing like the rest of the crowd. He's standing there, lips parted and big doe eyes gleaming with unshed tears. Ethereal beauty.  
The rest of the song rings through the air, fragile and soft, filling his heart.

_'I went out to find you who looked just like me._  
_Even if I tried to pull you...._

_Every time I look up in the sky,_  
_there's no star._  
_It's OK, you are my universe. Shine brightly for me.'_

The last note rings and the crowd goes completely batshit. They're yelling, screaming hopping happily. Lucas feels slightly overwhelmed. The adrenaline in his veins making his body buzz and the golden sun around his wrist catching the starlight.

-

The four of them are jumping and laughing backstage, the adrenaline rush not quite having worn off yet. That is until Lucas sees his phone light up with a new message.

 

_Hyuckie_  
_meet me at the merry-go-round??_

_Lucas_  
_right now?_

_Hyuckie_  
_Yes please._

 

Lucas immediantly throws on a hoodie as to not catch a cold in the night air. He takes his phone and hurries to his friends.

"Uhm I gotta say hi to a friend real quick. I'll be right back."  
They all grin and nod, telling him to come back soon to leave for the 'after show party' that's planned at Johnny's place. And with that Lucas is gone.

He hurriedly presses through the crowds, a few people who watched their performance smiling at him or greeting him. He doesn't have time to stop though, too worried that something happened.

He joggs the last few meters to the merry-go-round. Donghyuck is standing in front of it, the yellow lights making his skin glow golden. Lucas sighs in relief. He seems physically fine.

"Hey, Baby is everything-"  
The breath get knocked out of his lungs when Hyuck surges forward to hug him tightly as soon as he notices Lucas. His arms wrapped tightly around his necks and his face pressed into Lucas's nape.  
"-okay?" he breathes out.

His hand comes up to thread through the soft locks on Hyuck's head.  
"Did something happen?" Lucas murmurs into his temple. Donghyuck shakes his head.

It's quiet for a few more seconds, until Donghyuck whispers quietly, his warm breath hitting Lucas's neck:  
"Thank you, so much. That song was...." he takes a shaky breath.  
"It was really amazing."

Hyuck pulls back cups Lucas's face to kiss him.  
"Thank you too." Lucas murmurs against the soft lips.  
"The bracelet is really cute." he grins.

Donghyuck shrugs it off.  
"No problem. It's not a big deal." they look into each other's eyes,the festival lights reflecting in brown orbs. Lucas sighs.

"Jesus. I love you so much."  
Startled, Hyuck laughs out loud, his eyes crinkling and lips stretching.  
"I love you too you sappy shit."

The stars are glowing above their heads shining their bright light down. The moon is watching over them protecting them in their own little world. Lucas wonders if the night sky will always be there to envelope the two of them in love and security.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This song is soooo perfect! I love it soooo much! 
> 
> N. Flying - Rooftop ❤️💕💜💗💋💙💜
> 
> Okay so if any of you ever have questions just ask them in the comments! I basically read all of them😅


	10. Dustbowl Dance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "oh honey you got a big storm coming for ya."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been so long! But writing the ending for this story has been really hard for me...😱
> 
> This is almost the last chapter I feel emotional. 😪

The kitchen is fogged up and smells intensely of dope. Lucas takes a deep drag from the joint that him and the guys are passing around and let's the white smoke move past his lips. He watches the cloud slowly curl around itself taking the colors of blue and pink neon lights with.

He's a bit sad that he had to part ways with Hyuck and didn't get to spend the rest of the evening, cuddled up together, but they had to when the guys started looking for Lucas to leave for the party. 

The after show party at Johnny's place has been going for at least 4 hours now. They all exchanged their sweaty stage outfits for comfy clothes and crammed in the kitchen after most guests disappeared, leaving only a few dancing people here and there. 

As soon as he lowers his hand, Jaehyun reaches out to snatch the joint from him. Lucas let's him because he already feels fuzzy enough as it is, the adrenalin still pumping in his veins. 

"Woah I love you guys so much."  
Mark slurs from were he sits cross legged on the kitchen counter with a bottle of vodka perched in his lap. He earlier decided that he doesn't feel like smoking and would much rather get shitfaced with alcohol. Lucas feels slight pity for the intense hangover that Mark going to suffer from without a doubt. 

"We love you too Mark." Johnny laughs. He's leaning against the counter next to Lucas with a brilliant smile.  
"Everybody loved our performance. And the new songs!" he sighs in content and ruffles Lucas's hair. 

Jaehyun takes another drag and starts talking, the smoke slowly escaping his mouth in the process.  
"We fucking rocked that festival." he nods.  
His voice sounds muffled and heavy with the smoke still lingering in his throat.

Lucas agrees. He loves being on stage, the rush and the huge crowds swaying to their songs. It always makes him feel more alive and buzz with energy. He swears he can still feel the emotions in every single cell of his body. 

"Okay whoa slowly." says someone from the kitchen's entrance. Their heads turn in the direction of the door at the same time. Except for Mark who, in his drunken haze, can't do anything but lean his head against the wall and close his eyes. If he falls asleep they'll just make Jaehyun carry him upstairs to sleep. 

Lucas needs a few moments until he can make out a stressed and slightly tipsy Renjun trying to stabilize a swaying Hyuck. Lucas tilts his head. Seems like his boyfriend had a little too much. He pushes off the counter and is about to make sure that Hyuck is okay. 

He barely takes a step forward until he realizes that he's still with Johnny. Lucas tries to keep his facial expression as neutral as possible. He clenches and unclenches his fist. They have to be careful. Especially because he's high and Hyuck is drunk. Johnny can't know.

However Hyuck doesn't seem to care about all that at all. He stumbles a bit and is put back in place by Renjun's hands holding his shoulders. His flickering eyes scan the room, pointedly ignoring Renjun fussing about him until his eyes land on Lucas. A big smile stretches across his face.

"Xuxi!" he exclaims excitedly.  
Renjun whose hands are quickly pushed off looks shocked when he realises Lucas is right there with Johnny. He stares with wide, blown eyes. Lucas tries to send his best panicked look. 'help me!' 

Donghyuck stumbles in his direction and almost falls but catches himself last minute on the other end of the counter. Lucas has to dig his hands into marble to not immediantly start running over. Renjun scurries after Donghyuck and tries to lead him away which only earns him a deadly scowl and soft push. 

"Injunie!" he wags his finger accusingly.  
"That's not very nice. I wanna stay here." he murmurs like he's scolding a small child. It's weirdly adorable. 

Renjun catches his gaze once more and tries to gently pry Hyuck away.  
"Come on Hyuckie, we have to go." Renjun tries desperately.

"Just let him stay." Johnny shrugs.  
"We can look out for him. You go have some more fun!" Johnny smiles. He means good. Renjun however looks desperate and lost. He's trying hard to convince the other to leave but Hyuck stubbornly marches over to Lucas.

"Xuxi!" he grins once more when he's standing right in front of Lucas. His gaze looks unfocused, eyes drifting to its surroundings when he gets distracted every so often.

Hyuck reaches up to wrap his arms tightly around Lucas's neck and let's his head lull against his shoulder with a tiny thump. The stench of alcohol and sweat mixing with Hyuck's perfume makes panic bubble up inside of him. They're too close. 

His eyes snap to Jaehyun who has his eyebrows furrowed slightly. He doesn't even dare glancing in Johnny's direction, too scared of the reaction he'll witness. 

The warm breaths that softly caress his neck make shivers run down his spine and goosebumps rise on his arms. His eyes drift to Renjun who's watching them with a scared face and is chewing on his thumb nail. He swallows hard and glances back at the others. 

Mark is so far gone that he doesn't even spare him a glance. Jaehyun now has an eyebrow raised, the joint forgotten where it's resting between his fingers. He slowly turns to look at Johnny who's expression has confusion written all over it. Fuck. 

Suddenly Hyuck starts moving and rubs his cheek against Lucas's shoulder and neck.  
" 'm so proud of you." he mumbles.  
"The song was so nice..." Hyuck trails off and noses along Lucas's cheek. 

"You really are the sweetest." Hyuck whispers into his ear. He leans in close and presses his slightly chapped, warm lips against Lucas's jaw. Tiny kisses are littered across his skin. Out of instinct his one hand flies to stabilize Hyuck and carefully holds his waist. Lucas gently pushed Donghyuck back but he won't budge. 

This is extremely dangerous. Johnny is right there, literally only a couple of inches next to them, frozen from shock. Lucas feels the fear rise and settle in his throat. 

He tries to push once more but Hyuck whines and tightens his hold around Lucas's shoulders. He sways as he pushes himself to stand on his tiptoes so that his face is only a few inches from Lucas. He swallows hard.  
"Hyuck, don't." he tries desperately.  
"Don't be mean..." he whines and Lucas heart almost breaks.  
"I thought you love me?" 

It's barely above a whisper but the room is already quiet and tense as it is and Lucas knows everybody heard because Jaehyun lets out a quiet gasp but can't think about it too much because suddenly Hyuck presses their lips together and Lucas feels like crying. This can't be happening. 

A rough hand circles around Hyuck's upper arm and yanks him back harshly. The frail and on top of that drunk boy is almost sent flying and staggers back until his body hits the fridge. Lucas winces.

He follows the hand that's tightly holding Hyuck's upper arm and catches Johnny's eyes. He feels like throwing up. Pure betrayal and anger look back at him. Johnny, sweet and patient Johnny, never looked so downright livid. 

"Okay what the fuck is going on." he grits through his teeth, voice so dangerously low that Lucas feels it resounding in his core.  
Hyuck's face is contorted in pain and he tries to pry off Johnny's iron grip to no avail. Lucas's eyes frantically flicker between his boyfriend and Johnny. 

His mouth feels too dry to answer. What's he supposed to say? That he's madly in love with Donghyuck? That they've been going out for a month? Johnny's frown deepens. 

"Fucking start talking!" he says, loud voice cutting through the room. Jaehyun hops of the counter and carefully walks over.  
"Johnny, Dude chill." he tries. 

Johnny is having none of it though. His eyes snap over to Jaehyun for a moment and he glares hard.  
"Shut the fuck up!" he grints.  
"This is none of your business." 

Jaehyun frowns but seems to know better and takes a step back. Johnny immediantly fixes his gaze on Lucas again.  
"Start. Explaining." he growls grip tightening further. 

Donghyuck is still fighting the hold and desperately tries to remove Johnny's bruising hand but can't. His small hands are trying to loosen the fingers that are continuously tightening around his arm. Lucas feels anger pooling inside of his chest when there are tears pricking at Hyuck's eyes. He balls up his fists.  
"You're hurting him." he tries, as calm as possible. 

Johnny doesn't budge and only frowns deeper.  
"Lucas I swear to God I'll fucking rip your head off if you don't-" he hisses but is cut off by a voice from the doorway.  
"Fucking let go Johnny!" 

Lucas turns and sees Yeri standing in the doorway with Renjun looking close to tears behind her. He must have hurried to get her when the drama started. Lucas has never felt more thankful. 

Johnny's gaze shifts to Hyuck who has silent tears rolling down his cheeks and claws at his hand. He immediantly pulls away like he's been burned, his eyes blown wide. He stammers out a quiet 'sorry' and tries to reach forward. Donghyuck pushes him off so weakly he barely moves an inch. Johnny doesn't attempt to get closer again. 

"I hate you." Hyuck chokes out with a quiet sob. His hand is rubbing the place where Johnny was grabbing him seconds ago. His eyes lift and Lucas heart breaks for real this time. There are wet trails on his cheeks and some of the tears caught in his eyelashes. His eyes look glassy and helpless like he's already given up. 

"Don't you want us to be happy?" he whimpers almost.  
"You're the reason Yeri's boyfriend broke up with her because she couldn't be with him openly." he glares and accusingly stabs his finger to Johnny's chest. He's still swaying on his feet and has to press a hand to the fridge to stay upright. 

"Because of you I can't date Lucas openly. Do you think we're your property?" Hyuck asks. His words sound slurred.  
"I'm so sick of this." he murmurs, there are new tears streaming down his cheeks. Another broken sob echoes through the kitchen. 

"Ever since mom and dad died you've been nothing but controlling. You act like you own me and I hate it!" he slurs angrily. 

"I hate you." 

They are only 3 words but they feel heavier than anything else and Lucas swears they make his ears ring. Johnny steps back with wide eyes like he's been slapped. But a slap probably would've hurt less than those three words. 

Yeri walks up to them and wraps her arm around Hyuck. Lucas swears he can see the tears threatening to fall from her eyes.  
"Hyuckie I think that's enough." she whispers. Her eyes shift to look at Johnny in sympathy.  
"I think I'd be best if you go cool off. You can talk about this in the morning when your heads are clear." she states, finality clear.

Johnny's face contorts to a sneer and he grabs his jacket. He walks past Lucas without sparing him a glance and knocks their shoulders together aggressively on his way out. Lucas winces.

He doesn't have time to dwell on it because next thing he knows, Hyuck dashes over to the kitchen sink and leans over it. He wretches and Lucas cringes at the platter sound of vomit hitting the sink but rushes over without a second thought. 

Lucas softly brushes Hyuck's bangs out of his face and runs circles on his back with the other hand. When the biting stench of vomit hits his nose he decides on breathing through his mouth but doesn't leave Hyuck's side. He frowns in sympathy because he can feel the muscles below his hand tensing and sees the tears pooling from the corner of his eyes. 

Someone clearing their throat makes him avert his concerned gaze. He catches Jaeyhun's eyes. 

"So..." he trails off.  
"You're dating." it wasn't a question but a conclusion.  
Lucas nods dumbly. The uneasy, nervous feeling is clawing at his guts again. 

Jaehyun nods slowly and smiles.  
"Well I guess I owe Mark twenty bucks. He said you weren't straight. Fucking bitch knew it." he laughs a little. Lucas frowns.  
"You bet on me?" he asks.  
"Yeah. I thought you were straight as a ruler." Jaehyun shrugs. 

Lucas can't quite comprehend what was coming out of Jaehyun's mouth so he just nods slowly.  
"Talking about Mark, I think I'll bring him upstairs to sleep." Jaehyun explains. He turns around and carefully pries the bottle of vodka from Mark's fingers before throwing the boy over his shoulder. As he walks past Lucas he stops for a second and pats his shoulder. 

"Johnny will get over it. I'm sure. And I'm happy for you." he assures with a dimpled smile. Lucas smiles back and feels relieved. Jaehyun is the coolest guy. Even though he can be really stupid sometimes. Jaehyun slaps his back once more and smiles at Yeri and Renjun as he leaves the kitchen. 

A deep sigh leaves Lucas's lips. Fucking amazing. Donghyuck however stopped wretching and breathes heavy where he's still leaning over the sink.  
"You'll take good care of him, right?" Yeri calls out to him. Lucas looks at her, nods and smiles. She seems content enough and spins around to leave the room with Renjun who appears rather shaken up.  
"I'll tell everyone the party is over." he hears Yeri mumble under her breath. 

Lucas turns to his smashed boyfriend. He affectionately rubs Donghyuck's neck.  
"Are you sleepy?" he asks hushed.  
Donghyuck slowly stands upright and leans his weight against Lucas. He nods tiredly. 

Lucas laughs lightly and leans down to grab Hyuck under his thighs and lift him up. Their chests are pressed together like this, Hyuck's legs dangling on both sides of Lucas's torso and his arms are wrapped around his neck. Hyuck buries his face in Lucas's neck. He must be exhausted. 

He only smiles and carries his drunk boyfriend out of the kitchen. Navigating through the masses with an arm full of Donghyuck proves itself to be difficult. Carrying him upstairs is even harder and Lucas concentrates hard so the both of them don't fall down the stairs.

A relieved sigh leaves his lips when he finally stands in front of Hyuck's bedroom door. His one arm wraps around his boyfriend and he quickly uses the other to push down the handle and open the door. He kicks it closed behind them and carefully lays Donghyuck on his bed. 

Lucas brushes hair out of his boyfriend's scrunched up face. Even completely drunk Donghyuck is the most adorable thing ever.  
"Hey you okay?" he whispers.  
Donghyuck nods, his eyes still closed.  
"Okay I'll go get some stuff and be right back. Be a good boy and don't fall asleep okay?" he asks. 

Donghyuck pries his eyes open and smiles lopsided up at him.  
"I promise." he slurrs sleepily and tugs at Lucas sleeve.  
"Can you give me your hoodie? I'm cold." he looks up with big puppy dog eyes and Lucas just melts on the spot. 

He huffs a quiet laugh and immediantly tugs his hoodie over his head and helps Donghyuck sit up.  
"Arms up." he orders and Donghyuck lifts his arms so Lucas can pull his hoodie over his head. The grey fabric falls loosely around his shoulders. 

Lucas thinks he'll never get over how beautiful Hyuck looks in his clothes. His boyfriend yawns and holds a hand, hidden by the too long sleeves in front of his mouth. Does he want Lucas dead? 

"Stay awake it'll just be a few minutes." Lucas presses a soft kiss to his forehead and hurries out the door. He grabs a bucket and two bottles of water from the kitchen. He gets Hyuck's toothbrush, some toothpaste and a couple of aspirin from the bathroom downstairs. He's been in the Seo household often enough to know his way around. 

He almost sprints back upstairs and smiles when Donghyuck sits cross legged on his bed and smiles at him. Lucas grins and sets down the bucket next to the bed and one of the two bottles and the aspirin on the bedside table.  
"You stayed awake." he fondly ruffles Hyuck's hair. 

Donghyuck nods proudly and grins back.  
"Just like you told me to." Donghyuck mumbles.  
Lucas smiles.  
"Ah you're so cute when you're drunk. So sweet." he caresses Donghyuck's cheek before he grabs the toothbrush and puts some toothpaste on it.  
"Open up." he says and Hyuck complies. 

He starts brushing Hyuck's teeth carefully. There's no way he'll let him sleep with the disgusting taste of vomit in his mouth. He leans forward and carefully grabs Donghyuck's jaw to make sure he gets all the teeth as clean as possible. 

A grin inevitablly makes it's way onto his face. There is no trace to be found of the usually so snarky and cunning boy he knows. Drunk Hyuck is pliant and obedient and so cute that it makes him want to squeal. Which he doesn't. Because that'd be embarrassing. 

After a few minutes he deems his job as done and grabs the bucket from his side. Donghyuck immediantly understands and spits the excess toothpaste inside. 

Next is the water bottle. He grabs one and holds it out to Hyuck, who just furrows his eyebrow and frowns at it.  
"Drink up." he says. Donghyuck whines and complains about being tired but finishes the bottle with a little bit of coaxing and bribing. 

Lucas smiles. He pushes all things off the bed. He wraps his arms around Hyuck and lays them both down. After some shuffling and arranging their limbs, he absent-mindedly brushes the bangs out of Hyuck's face and pats his head. 

"If you feel bad tonight you can use the bucket okay?" he starts explaining.  
"For tomorrow there's another bottle of water and aspirin if you get a headache. If somethings wrong don't hesitate to wake me up."  
Donghyuck nods again but doesn't close his eyes to sleep just yet. 

The room is quiet for minutes until a sad sniffle rips through the air and through his heart. He looks at Hyuck and sees the boy crying silently.  
"I don't hate Johnny. I didn't mean it." he whispers watery. Lucas nods.  
"I- I love him s-so much.... And n-ow he- he's angry at me. Wha- What if he doesn't love m- me anymore?" Donghyuck rambles small huckups interrupting him. Big eyes are staring at Lucas in uncertainty.  
"I know baby. We'll talk to him tomorrow. It'll be fine I promise." he cooes and wipes away the hot tears. 

Donghyuck buries his face in Lucas's neck.  
"Promise you won't leave me no matter what." he whispers, muffled my Lucas's shirt.  
Lucas pulls him closer and presses a kiss to the top of his head.  
"I promise." 

Even when Hyuck stops sniffling and his breath evens out, Lucas lays wide awake. He can't get Johnny's betrayed face out of his head. He never meant for the brothers to argue this bad. For him and Johnny to argue this bad. He has to solve this as soon as possible. If not for his own sake then for Donghyuck's. 

He's almost surprised when a hit tear slides down his face. He should be strong now. For Hyuck but.... why does it feel like everything's crashing down on him? Like he's even managed to destroy this family? 

His heart feel heavy in his chest, like it's not string enough to pump all the blood through his body. He takes a shaky breath and bites his lip, hard. He doesn't reach up to wipe his tears. Lucas is too scared of waking Hyuck up if he moves. 

His finger desperately clutch around the fabric of his own hoodie around Donghyuck. He closes his eyes, too scared that if hell let go he'll even lose the last person still there for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me what you stories you always wanted to read! I need inspiration!
> 
> Also do any of you know what my chapter titles are referencing to? If yes I'll love you foreverrrrr❤️


	11. After the Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You are.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry I took so long with the final chapter but here it finally is
> 
> I feel emotional...

They enter the kitchen, clutching onto each other the very next morning. The entire house is drastically quiet save for some cutlery clinking against plates. Not even the kitchen radio, that would usually ring soft tunes through the house at this time, is on.

Lucas looks at Hyuck. He's gnawing at his lip, his face as pale as a ghost. Lucas knows he doesn't look any better. His shoulders are straight and tense and his jaw aches from grinding his teeth too hard in his sleep.

They take a deep breath and Lucas carefully tugs Hyuck to enter the kitchen. It becomes impossibly quieter as they step into view.

Yeri is sitting at the table, reading a magazine and munching cereal with Mark across from her. He has his head laying pillowed by his arms on the table, barely alive. Jaehyun tries to smile encouragingly from where he's leaning against the counter stirring a coffee cup. It looks more awkward than anything but Lucas appreciates the effort.

"Morning." Yeri mufflers through her half chewed cereal without even looking up at them. Lucas opens his mouth to reply but is interrupted by a quiet voice speaking up next to him.

"Where is Johnny?"

Everyone's movements halt immediantly. The drop of a needle probably could've been heard in the room. 

Yeri is the first who catches herself and clears her throat.  
"Uhm... He hasn't come back yet."

Lucas looks over at Hyuck. His shoulders are slowly sinking as if even the last bit of energy is seeping out of his body. His eyes water.

Lucas is about to hug him, tell him everything will be fine when a small hand grabs his sleeve and tugs pathetically.  
"Can we go upstairs please." Hyuck whispers to him. Small and tired. Lucas clenches his jaw. 

"You should eat something." he tries to reason and grabs the clenched hand carefully. Donghyuck furiously shakes his head, eyes unfocused.   
"m' not hungry. Please." he asks eyes wavering but never really looking at any of them. 

Lucas sighs and glances at Yeri apologetically. She just offers a strained smile and nods. 

"Fine. But you'll have to eat something later." he speaks quietly. Hyuck nods in agreement and already turns to walk up the stairs.

Lucas looks at Jaehyun and tries to muster a smile. He just steps forward and hugs Lucas quickly. Lucas holds onto Jaehyun's shirt and takes a shuddering breath.

He won't lose them. He won't lose them. He won't lose them. - repeats in his head over and over like a mantra. 

Jaehyun sighs and pats his back.   
"Johnny will come around eventually. He could never stay angry at us for too long." He smiles, dimples on full display before turning Lucas by the shoulders and pushing him towards the stairs. 

"Now go take care of your boyfriend." he chuckles.   
"I think he needs you to be there for him right now."   
Lucas nods and hurries up the staircase. 

Donghyuck is hunched on his bed, head hanging low. His body is completely still. He doesn't even move a muscle when Lucas sits on the floor in front of him. He reaches out grabbing Donghyuck hand in his. It feels dead. Limply laying in his own hands. He notices a familiar sting in his eyes and the pickling feeling in his nose, vision slightly blurry. 

"I'm sorry." he forces his vocal chords to choke out. 

At that Hyuck lifts his eyes looking back at Lucas. His face is expressionless.   
There's a faint pressure on his hand. An attempt at comfort. 

"It's not your fault." Donghyuck whispers.   
"I'm just-" he sighs.   
"I'm tired and my head feels like it's going to explode. I think I should take a nap." he explains simultaneously laying down and curling up underneath the blankets. 

Lucas is left in utter silence. Giving his mind space to yell at him. To scream and to bang against his temples. 

This is his fault. He has to fix it. 

-

Lucas feels something uneasy swirling in the pit of his stomach. Almost like all the nervousness that settled deep within is crawling up his throat. 

There are only a handful of places where Johnny could've gone. His first thought was that he might have went to Taeil, an old high-school friend but Lucas knows for a fact that Taeil is currently on a trip with his family. 

His next option was Irene. Johnny used to work at the same diner with her until he got a better job offer. So Lucas went to the diner. He found Irene but no Johnny. 

That left one last possibility of Johnny's whereabouts. 

'Dream in a Dream' the humongous neon sign above the entrance reads. It looks noticibly less impressive in the daylight than at night, when vibrant pinks and purples shine from the bar.

The only visible thing from outside is a sign that's hanging between the blinds and the glass door. Bold, red letters spelling 'closed' mock him as he prays to god that Ten didn't actually lock the door.

He flinches when his hands wrap around the cold metal twisting the doornob and pulling it towards himself just a few centimeters. It's open.

"We're closed!" Ten yells, voice muffled through the small crack of the door.

He takes one last, deep breath, letting the cold morning air fill his lungs and pushes the door all the way open to step inside.

The interior of the bar is nicer than it looks from the outside. Dark wood covers the walls with colorful signs and loads of framed pictures decorating them. He spots Ten behind the wooden counter first, who groans and whips around from where he seemingly unpacks liquor bottles from a box.

"I said we're -"  
He stops mid sentence when he recognizes him.  
"Xuxi?"   
Lucas smiles sheepishly and lifts his hand to awkwardly wave. He isn't as close with Ten as Johnny or Jaehyun but they've met several times like when Ten designed their logo or when he opened the bar. 

Ten smiles sadly at him and nods his head to the side. Lucas follows the motion and sees Johnny's hunched form half sitting in the barstool, half laying on the counter, using his arms as a pillow. Next to him line up bottles over bottles and empty glasses. 

His throat feels too dry all of sudden and he swallows.  
"I'll step out for a smoke and leave you two alone." Ten smiles and scurries out the back sending one last encouraging glance.

Lucas plops down on the bar stool left to Johnny and softly nudges his side. Johnny only groans.  
"What do you want Lucas?" he asks without opening his eyes. So he's been awake.

"I think we should talk." he answers. 

It's silent again. The only sound being the soft click of the clock that erupts everytime the clock hand moves. Lucas thought Johnny is ignoring him. So angry and betrayed that he's flat out refusing ro talk to him anymore.

Until Johnny nods slowly and sighs. There are a few more beats of silence until he actually starts talking. 

"I don't fucking know what I'm doing anymore." his voice wavers.   
"I'm supposed to protect Yeri and Hyuckie. I feel like no matter what I do I'll fuck them up. They're my responsibility. Since my parents are gone I tried to-" he stops.

"I don't even know what I'm trying honestly." 

Johnny lifts his head raking his hands through his hair.   
"Fuck." he curses resting his head in his hands, pressing his palms against his eyes. 

Johnny takes a shuddering breath. Lucas notices the slight quicker of Johnny's body, how he's trying to take in calming breaths. 

"I miss my mom and dad." he chokes out, a tear rolling past his hands.

Lucas freezes. 

Not once in his life did he see Johnny cry. 

Not when he his girlfriend broke up with him. Not when Hyuck left to Canada. Not even when their cat died. Johnny was always so... strong and unshakeable.

He feels helpless. He doesn't know how to comfort someone he'd never thought would need any comfort. 

But now Johnny is sitting right in front of him, aggressively pressing his hands into his eyes and choking on the sobs he's trying to conceal.

"I can't lose them too. They're all I've left. And now Hyuck, he- I mean I never wanted- I can't-" he stumbles over his words.

Lucas rests his head on Johnny's shoulder noticing how badly he's shaking.   
"He didn't mean it you know." Lucas whispers.  
"He loves you. A lot. And he looks up to you so much. All he ever wanted was your approval."

A pathetic sob wretches itself from Johnny's chest. Lucas feels a warm tear sliding down his own cheek.  
"You know you're my family too." he whispers too scared his voice will break when he talks any louder. 

The tears start streaming down Lucas's own cheeks. He's never dared to say it out loud but it's true. 

His dad never was family. His mom is gone away now. Without Johnny and Hyuck and the other guys he'd be - 

alone. 

"Hyuck and I-" he sniffs.  
"We never wanted to hurt you. Never." Lucas explains.  
"But I can't stop loving him. You guys are my family. All that I've left right now." he says and Johnny's shoulders start shaking even more violently. 

"I don't think I could take losing you." 

The silence after stretches for minutes. Lucas observes the clock ticking on behind the counter for what feels like forever. 

His own eyes burn and suddenly his body feels too tired to even lift itself. He's just so... exhausted. 

Johnny continuously sucks in deep breaths. They were shaky and riggid at first but now they're stable. Calm. 

"I'm sorry." Johnny whispers.   
"I was being and asshat. I should always be happy if two of the most important people in my life, my family, are happy." Johnny says, staring at the wall as well. 

Lucas chuckles tiredly.   
"Yeah you were kind of an asshat." he repeats earning him a weak punch to the shoulder and a sarcastic laugh from Johnny.

Lucas rubs the spot on his shoulder and smiles at Johnny.  
"I'm sorry too. For keeping this from you." he grins. Johnny glances at him and nods when he looks ahead again his lips twisting up ever so slightly before his expression falls again.

"I need to talk to Hyuckie." he abruptly stands up and runs to the door to grab his coat. He wrenches the entry open but stops in his tracks turning back to look at Lucas once more.  
"You coming or what?" he urges. 

Lucas can only laugh and follow.

-

His fingertips softly grace across the skin of Hyuck's back, exposed to the morning sun. He feels the vibrations from the soft hums of an unfamiliar song moving through Hyuck's torso.

"Can you believe?" he asks.

Donghyuck turns his head and pushes himself up to rest his weight on his forearms smiling down at where Lucas is splayed across the sheets.

"Believe what?" he questions placing a soft kiss on Lucas's lips.

"That I really am the happiest man on earth." he grins.  
Donghyuck chuckles and shifts so he's spread out right next to him, softly grinning back.  
"Are you now." he whispers mischievously.

Lucas nods proudly.  
"I am. Everything is going just wonderful. Pauper Lions is going to a test recording. We're going to see my mom soon." he counts down carefully brushing a few stands of hair out of his boyfriends face.

"And that isn't even the best part yet."  
Hyuck laughs softly looping his arms around Lucas's neck and pulling so close their noses are almost touching.

"What is the best part then?" he asks soft breaths brushing against Lucas's face.  
He feels the warmth seep through his body and smiles, leaning up to press a kiss to the top of Hyuck's nose.

"You are."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please tell me how you liked the story.
> 
> I want to thank everyone who read this and supported me all throughout writing this. 
> 
> I love you all💛💛💛

**Author's Note:**

> Is this fluffy?  
> Idk  
> Yall don't even know what's coming for you.


End file.
